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故园风雨后|Brideshead Revisited

第五章 牛津的秋天——和雷克斯·莫特拉姆共进午餐——和博伊·马尔卡斯特共进晚餐——萨姆格拉斯先生——马奇梅因夫人在家里——不合世俗的塞巴斯蒂安

属类： 双语小说 【分类】世界名著 -[作者: 伊夫林-沃] 阅读：[99774]
Chapter 5
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1
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“这是牛津的特点，”我说，“秋季开始新一学年。”

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‘IT is typical of Oxford,’ I said, ‘to start the new year in autumn.’

2
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[p1]鹅卵石路、碎石板路、草坪上……到处撒满了落叶，学院花园里篝火的烟与河上潮湿的雾裹在一处，漫飘过灰色的围墙；

2
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[p1]Everywhere, on cobble and gravel and lawn, the leaves were falling and in the college gardens the smoke of the bonfires joined the wet river mist, drifting across the grey walls;

3
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[p2]脚下的石板路黏腻湿滑，四方院子四周的窗棂后面渐次亮起了灯，

3
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[p2]the flags were oily underfoot and as, one by one, the lamps were lit in the windows round the quad,

4
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[p3]金色的光弥散开，晕起，身着簇新学袍的新生在暮色苍茫中穿过一道道拱门，一阵阵熟悉的钟声昭示出一年的记忆。

4
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[p3]the golden lights were diffuse and remote, new figures in new gowns wandered through the twilight under the arches and the familiar bells now spoke of a year’s memories.

5
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我们两人都会有伤春悲秋那样的荒凉心境，窗前的紫罗兰花叶凋残，那盈满一室的芬芳此时业已化作堆积在院子一隅的郁闷湿泥，此前六月里的狂欢生机，如今也和那紫罗兰一样，消逝不再了。

5
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The autumnal mood possessed us both as though the riotous exuberance of June had died with the gillyflowers whose scent at my windows now yielded to the damp leaves, smouldering in a corner of the quad.

6
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这是新学期首个星期天的晚上。

6
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It was the first Sunday evening of term.

7
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“我感觉自己足足有一百岁了。”塞巴斯蒂安说。

7
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‘I feel precisely one hundred years old,’ said Sebastian. 

8
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他是头天晚上到的，比我早一天。自上次出租车里一别之后，这还是头一次见。

8
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He had come up the night before, a day earlier than I, and this was our first meeting since we parted in the taxi.

9
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“今天下午我被贝尔主教训了一通。这已经是第四回了——先是我的导师，然后是低年级的院长，再然后是万灵学院的萨姆格拉斯先生，这回是贝尔主教。”

9
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‘I’ve had a talking to from Mgr Bell this afternoon. That makes the fourth since I came up - my tutor, the junior dean, Mr Samgrass of All Souls, and now Mgr Bell.’

10
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“万灵学院的萨姆格拉斯先生是谁呀？”

10
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‘Who is Mr Samgrass of All Souls?’

11
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[p1]“我母亲那边的一个什么人罢了。他们都说上年一开始我就起了个很差的头，还说已经有人盯上我了，如果再不注意品行的话，就要给我扫地出门。

11
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[p1]‘Just someone of mummy’s. They all say that I made a very bad start last year, that I have been noticed, and that if I don’t mend my ways I shall get sent down.

12
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[p2]可怎么才算品正行端呢？估计加入国家联盟协会就品正行端了，每周再读读《伊西斯》[1]，早上非得在卡德纳咖啡馆喝咖啡不可，抽烟抽大号烟斗，打板球，去‘野猪山’饮茶，到克普尔听讲座，骑脚踏车时车筐里装满笔记本，到了晚上再喝着热可可，认真严肃地讨论性事……

12
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[p2] How does one mend one’s ways? I suppose one joins the League of Nations Union, and reads the Isis every week, and drinks coffee in the morning at the Cadena café, and smokes a great pipe and plays hockey and goes out to tea on Boar’s Hill and to lectures at Keble, and rides a bicycle with a little tray full of notebooks and drinks cocoa in the evening and discusses sex seriously.

13
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[p3]嗨，我说查尔斯，上学期到底怎么了？发生什么事了？我怎么会觉得这么苍老。”

13
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[p3] Oh, Charles, what has happened since last term? I feel so old.’

14
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“感觉已经人到中年了似的，这可是大大的不妙哇。我敢断定，这里能享受的快活我们已经享受尽了，再也没法儿指望了。”

14
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‘I feel middle-aged. That is infinitely worse. I believe we have had all the fun we can expect here.’

15
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夜幕低垂，我们在炉火掩映中默默沉坐。

15
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We sat silent in the firelight as darkness fell.

16
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“安东尼·布兰奇已经离开学校了。”

16
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‘Anthony Blanche has gone down.’

17
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“怎么呢？”

17
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‘Why?’

18
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“他写信告诉我的。坦白说他在慕尼黑弄了套公寓——他和那里的一个警察难舍难分了。”

18
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‘He wrote to me. Apparently he’s taken a flat in Munich - he has formed an attachment to a policeman there.’

19
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“我会想他的。”

19
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‘I shall miss him.’

20
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“从某种意义上来说吧，我也会。”

20
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‘I suppose I shall, too, in a way.’

21
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我们复又陷入沉默，不说话了，只在摇曳的火光中静静坐着，静得以至于有人想找我，却在门口打量一番后以为屋内没人就又走开了。

21
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We fell silent again and sat so still in the firelight that a man who came in to see me, stood for a moment in the door and then went away thinking the room empty. 

22
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“这么开始新学年不是办法。”塞巴斯蒂安说。但十月这个阴霾的夜晚，仿佛将其潮湿寒冷的阴郁之气吹送到之后的好多个星期。整个学期，整个学年，我和塞巴斯蒂安过得形同隐居，泰迪熊阿洛伊修斯，就像被传教士藏起的神祇一样，搁在塞巴斯蒂安的五斗橱里，久而久之，再也没人理会它了。

22
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‘This is no way to start a new year,’ said Sebastian; but this sombre October evening seemed to breathe its chill, moist air over the succeeding-weeks. All that term and all that year Sebastian and I lived more and more in the shadows and, like a fetish, hidden first from the missionary and at length forgotten, the toy bear, Aloysius, sat unregarded on the chest-of-drawers in Sebastian’s bedroom.

23
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我们两个也变了。我们失去了那些曾让我们在一年级时纷乱的生活过得更加充实的、探新求奇的欲望。我踏实下来了。

23
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There was a change in both of us. We had lost the sense of discovery which had infused the anarchy of our first year. I began to settle down.

24
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不期然地，我想念堂兄贾斯珀。他在牛津大学文学院学位考试中得了第一，目前正在伦敦笨手拙脚地过着搅扰众生的日子。我需要他给我些冲击，少了他的强力刺激，学院的生活都显得轻飘飘没分量了——它不会再像夏天那么刺激我，使我的怒火啪一下碰见火星就着了。

24
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Unexpectedly, I missed my cousin Jasper, who had got his first in Greats and was now cumbrously setting about a life of public mischief in London; I needed him to shock; without that massive presence the college seemed to lack solidity; it no longer provoked and gave point to outrage as it had done in the summer.

25
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再说，我回来时就已经腻味得不行了，打定主意要放缓一些。我决不再被父亲的幽默拖着鼻子走，他那套古里古怪的迫害使得我相信再不量入为出地过日子就是愚蠢——这一点是任何别的斥责都不曾办到的。这学期我没再被要求谈话。我历史学得好，并且学期考试得了B-，这让我不费吹灰之力就和导师处得不错。

25
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Moreover, I had come back glutted and a little chastened; with the resolve to go slow. Never again would I expose myself to my father’s humour; his whimsical persecution had convinced me, as no rebuke could have done, of the folly of living beyond my means. I had had no talking-to this term; my success in History Previous and a beta minus in one of my Collections papers had put me on easy terms with my tutor which I managed to maintain without undue effort.

26
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[p1]我和历史学院保持着松散的联系，保证每周写齐两篇论文，不时举行的讲座也过去听听。此外，我在这学年伊始就进了拉斯金艺术学校。

26
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[p1]I kept a tenuous connection with the History School, wrote my two essays a week, and attended an occasional lecture. Besides this I started my second year by joining the Ruskin School of Art;

27
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[p2]一周有那么两三个早上，我们约莫有十来个人——其中至少一半是北牛津学生的女儿[2]——聚在阿什莫利恩博物馆古代作品的仿品周围。

27
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[p2]two or three mornings a week we melt, about a dozen of us - half, at least, the daughters of north Oxford among the casts from the antique at the Ashmolean Museum;

28
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[p3]一周还有两次在一家茶店楼上的小房间对着裸体模特儿画素描。痛点仅仅在于学校方面严格控制和杜绝夜晚与淫荡有关的一切，所以白天从伦敦请过来给我们做模特儿的年轻姑娘是不被允许留在大学城过夜的；

28
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[p3]twice a week we drew from the nude in a small room over a teashop; some pains were taken by the authorities to exclude any hint of lubricity on these evenings, and the young woman who sat to us was brought from London for the day and not allowed to reside in the University city;

29
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[p4]我还记得小房间里离煤油炉近的那面墙是玫瑰红的，另一面墙则斑斑驳驳，就好像被什么抓挠过似的。

29
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[p4] one flank, that nearer the oil stove, I remember, was always rosy and the other mottled and puckered as though it had been plucked.

30
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[p5]在那儿，就着煤油灯的气味，我们坐在驴墩上，召唤池瑞欧比[3]隐约可辨的灵魂加持自己的灵感。我画的画一文不名；

30
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[p5]There, in the smell of the oil lamp, we sat astride the donkey stools and evoked a barely visible wraith of Trilby. My drawings were worthless;

31
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[p6]在自己房间里煞费苦心临摹出的小作品，有些就被当时的一些朋友保存起来了，可当它们偶然出现在眼前时我就会很窘很窘。

31
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[p6] in my own rooms I designed elaborate little pastiches, some of which, preserved by friends of the period, come to light occasionally to embarrass me.

32
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[p1]指导教师是一位和我年纪相仿的男人，对我们怀有一种戒备的敌意；

32
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[p1]We were instructed by a man of about my age, who treated us with defensive hostility;

33
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[p2]他穿着很深的蓝衬衫，打着条柠檬黄领带，戴着副玳瑁框架眼镜——其中很大一部分是缘自于此的警诫，我尽力修正了自己的着装风格，直到接近堂兄贾斯珀认为的适合穿着去乡村别墅做客的程度。

33
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[p2]he wore very dark blue shirts, a lemon-yellow tie, and horn-rimmed glasses, and it was largely by reason of this warning that I modified my own style of dress until it approximated to what my cousin jasper would have thought suitable for country-house visiting.

34
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[p3]既穿着举止体得，又有着高尚追求热衷于绘画，我摇身一变，俨然一位学院里相当受人尊重的人物。

34
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[p3]Thus soberly dressed and happily employed I became a fairly respectable member of my college.

35
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塞巴斯蒂安那边的情形就是两样了。他那一年的肆意妄为填满了他深刻的内里需要，逃避现实。一旦他觉出曾经自由自在的地方越来越受到羁绊和限制时，他就变得越来越消极无力，乖僻暴戾。就算我在也是一样。

35
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With Sebastian it was different. His year of anarchy had filled a deep, interior need of his, the escape from reality, and as he found himself increasingly hemmed in, where he once felt himself free, he became at times listless and morose, even with me.

36
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这个学期，我们依然形影不离的，所以也省得去别处再找朋友。堂兄贾斯珀曾经跟我说过，到二年级甩掉一年级交的那些狐朋狗友是再正常不过的事。诚如他所言，我的朋友们——绝大多数都是通过塞巴斯蒂安结识的——我们把他们全都给甩了，而且也不再交新的了。没有提前知会声明，说甩全甩。开始乍看上去，好像还和以前一样，我们会经常去看望他们；我们也参加派对，但去归去自己却不举办了。

36
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We kept very much to our own company that term, each so much bound up in the other that we did not look elsewhere for friends. My cousin Jasper had told me that it was normal to spend one’s second year shaking off the friends of one’s first, and it happened as he said. Most of my friends were those I had made through Sebastian; together we shed them and made no others. There was no renunciation. At first we seemed to see them as often as ever; we went to parties but gave few of our own.

37
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我并不想给那些一年级新生留下什么印象，他们也像他们来自伦敦的姐姐妹妹一样，热衷于投身社交界。每个派对里都有许多新面孔，要是搁在几个月以前，我就会去热切结交，可现在却一点儿也提不起精神头。就连我们那个曾经在艳阳高照的夏天那么活跃的密友圈子，如今在弥漫的雾气和河上的暮霭中也黯然无光，悄寂无声，那种雾气和暮色使那一年中我的一切都变得非常柔弱，模糊不清。

37
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I was not concerned to impress the new freshmen who, like their London sisters were here being launched in Society; there were strange faces now at every party and I, who a few months back had been voracious of new acquaintances, now felt surfeited; even our small circle of intimates, so lively in the summer sunshine, seemed dimmed and muted now in the pervading fog, the river-borne twilight that softened and obscured all that year for me.

38
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安东尼·布兰奇一走，有些东西就随他而去了；他锁上房门后把钥匙悬挂在自己的钥匙链上；他在所有的朋友中，本来被视为路人，现在他们却都感到需要他了。

38
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Anthony Blanche had taken something away with him when he went; he had locked a door and hung the key on his chain; and all his friends, among whom he had always been a stranger, needed him now.

39
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我的感觉是一场慈善义演行将收场，乐团经理已经系好了羔皮外套纽扣，打算一拿到报酬就抬脚走人，那些无人关照郁郁寡欢的女演员一下子群龙无首了。

39
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The Charity matinée was over, I felt; the impresario had buttoned his astrakhan coat and taken his fee and the disconsolate ladies of the company were without a leader.

40
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一旦没有了他，她们把结语怎么讲也给忘了，要么台词也给念混念错；她们需要他及时打铃开幕；需要他恰逢其时地指导开启舞台灯光；需要他在台侧轻声念叨着提示；需要他看着乐队指挥专横跋扈的双眼；没有了他，就没有了周刊派摄影师过来拍照，没有了事先安排好的友善气氛和可预期的荣耀感。没有比共同的事业更能把她们紧密地联系在一起了。现在，金缎带和天鹅绒都打包送回到戏服部，她们只能穿着闷沉沉灰头土脸的制服。

40
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Without him they forgot their cues and garbled their lines; they needed him to ring the curtain up at the right moment; they needed him to direct the lime-lights they needed his whisper in the wings, and his imperious eye on the leader of the band; without him there were no photographers from the weekly press, no prearranged goodwill and expectation of pleasure. No stronger bond held them together than common service; now the gold lace and velvet were packed away and returned to the costumier and the drab uniform of the day put on in its stead.

41
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经过几小时愉快的排练，投入欢喜的几分钟演出，她们表现了光彩照人的角色，扮成自己伟大的前辈，完美再现了著名画作中的那些人物。但现在，曲终人散了，她们必须在惨淡的日光中各自择路回家，回到频繁往来伦敦的丈夫身边，回到牌桌上完败的情人身边，回到长得太快的孩子身边。

41
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For a few happy hours of rehearsal, for a few ecstatic minutes of performance, they had played splendid parts, their own great ancestors, the famous paintings they were thought to resemble; now it was over and in the bleak light of day they must go back to their homes; to the husband who came to London too often, to the lover who lost at cards, and to the child who grew too fast.?

42
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安东尼·布兰奇的固定班底作鸟兽散了，蜕变成区区十几个了无生气的、处于青春期的英国人而已。时不时地，他们会在今后的日子里这样说，“你还记得我们在牛津时尽人皆知的那个与众不同的人物——安东尼·布兰奇吗？也不知道他后来怎么样了。”他们原本就是从人堆里给随意挑选出来的，现在又重新回到了原先的人堆里去，没怎么成长变化，也不出类拔萃，仍然个性模糊，没有辨识度。他们身上的变化尚且没有我们这么明显。他们偶尔还到我们这里聚个会，可是我们却再也不去看他们了。

42
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Anthony Blanche’s set broke up and became a bare dozen lethargic, adolescent Englishmen. Sometimes in later life they would say: ‘Do you remember that extraordinary fellow we used all to know at Oxford - Anthony Blanche? I wonder what became of him.’ They lumbered back into the herd from which they had been so capriciously chosen and grew less and less individually recognizable. The change was not so apparent to them as to us, and they still congregated on occasions in our rooms; but we gave up seeking them.

43
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相反，我们对出身草根的朋友却感到兴味，隔三岔五地，晚上往往就是在圣埃伯街和圣克莱门托街，或者旧市场和运河之间霍加斯[4]笔下的小酒馆里消磨掉时光的。我们在那种地方寻欢作乐，那里的人也很喜欢我们[5]。剧院附近的“花匠胳膊”“碎嘴头子”“首领德鲁伊”以及“黄泉路上的草皮”这些酒馆里的人都很熟悉我们了。最后提及的那个酒馆还挺容易就能碰上一些还没毕业的学生，是布雷斯诺兹学院的，捋着几家酒馆挨着喝过来的大学生运动员。每逢这种时候，塞巴斯蒂安就会心头升起嫌恶来，就像看到身上的军装与其兵种全不搭时所感受到的一样。于是我们有许多个夜晚就被那些闯入者给破坏了，他会扔下喝得半空的酒杯，闹着情绪回学校去。

[5]牛津当时禁止本科学生去酒吧饮酒。[4]18世纪画家。
43
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Instead we formed the taste for lower company and spent our evenings, as often as not, in Hogarthian little inns in St Ebb’s and St Clement’s and the streets between the old market and the canal, where we managed to be gay and were, I believe, well liked by the company. The Gardener’s Arms and the Nag’s Head, the Druid’s Head near the theatre, and the Turf in Hell Passage knew us well; but in the last of these we were liable to meet other undergraduates pub-crawling hearties from BNC - and Sebastian became possessed by a kind of phobia, like that which sometimes comes over men in uniform against their own service, so that many an evening was spoilt by their intrusion, and he would leave his glass half empty and turn sulkily back to college.

44
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马奇梅因夫人就是在这么样的一种情况之下看到我们的，其时她在牛津待了一个星期，正赶在米迦勒节一开始。她发现塞巴斯蒂安颓废委顿，他那成帮结伙的朋友只剩下了我这个“千顷地一根苗”。她接受了我是塞巴斯蒂安的朋友，同时想方设法让我也成为她的朋友。然而她这么做，却无意中撼动了我和塞巴斯蒂安的友谊根基——此番措辞仅仅是在她给予我的万千厚爱中所做的唯一的指责。

44
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It was thus that Lady Marchmain found us when, early in that Michaelmas term, she came for a week to Oxford. She found Sebastian subdued, with all his host of friends reduced to one, myself. She accepted me as Sebastian’s friend and sought to make me hers also, and in doing so, unwittingly struck at the roots of our friendship. That is the single reproach I have to set against her abundant kindness to me. 

45
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她来牛津，是找那位万灵学院的萨姆格拉斯先生——这位在我们的生活中戏份越来越足的先生办些事。马奇梅因夫人正在写一本只在朋友间传阅的回忆录，回忆的是她弟弟内德。在蒙斯和帕斯尚德尔遇难的三位传奇英雄里头，她弟弟是最年长的一位。他留存下一大批文件——诗歌、信件、讲演稿、文章，等等，要把这些文字整理、编纂起来，即便仅仅是在相对有限的朋友圈里传阅，也是需要战略战术，兼之以解决无穷无尽的问题的，想必这样的事情归由一位满怀恭敬之心的妹妹干起来便很容易出现差池。她不讳言承认这一点，所以她一直在寻求帮助，而萨姆格拉斯先生正是找来协助她工作的人选。

45
-

Her business in Oxford was with Mr Samgrass of All Souls, who now began to play an increasingly large part in our lives. Lady Marchmain was engaged in making a memorial book for circulation among her friends, about her brother, Ned, the eldest of three legendary heroes all killed between Mons and Passchendaele; he had left a, quantity of papers - poems, letters, speeches, articles; to edit them, even for a restricted circle, needed tact and countless decisions in which the judgement of an adoring sister was liable to err. Acknowledging this, she had sought outside advice, and Mr Samgrass had been found to help her.

46
-

萨姆格拉斯先生是一位年轻的历史学科教师，三寸丁的身段饱满溜圆，衣着利落，稀稀拉拉的头发也梳理得平平整整的，服服帖帖在其硕大的脑袋上，手灵活，脚很小，给人一个热爱洗洗涮涮过了头的印象。他态度亲善，俯仰有度，讲起话来具有独特的韵味。我们相当熟悉他。

46
-

He was a young history don, a short, plump man, dapper in dress, with sparse hair brushed flat on an over-large head, neat hands, small feet, and the general appearance of being too often bathed. His manner was genial and his speech idiosyncratic. We came to know him well.

47
-

萨姆格拉斯先生有个特殊的嗜好就是帮助别人汇编成书，不过他自己也编了好几本时髦小册子。他善于对档案的考据、研究，对鲜明生动的事实自带敏感体质。塞巴斯蒂安把萨姆格拉斯先生说成是“妈妈那边的什么人”，其实并不太符合实际情况……事实上，但凡是他感兴趣的什么人，那么他就是这个人“那边的”人了。

47
-

It was Mr Samgrass’s particular aptitude to help others with their work, but he was himself the author of several stylish little books. He was a great delver in muniment-rooms and had a sharp nose for the picturesque. Sebastian spoke less than the truth when he described him as ‘someone of mummy’s’; he was someone of almost everyone’s who possessed anything to attract him.

48
-

萨姆格拉斯先生是一位族系谱学家，铁杆拥戴正统王朝，尤其爱戴那些被剥夺了权位的贵族，而且明眸善睐，很懂得觊觎王权争权夺位者对王位提出的诸多诉求中，哪一个有准确合理的法律效力。他并没有宗教信仰，可是他对天主教会的了解比绝大多数天主教徒还要多。他在梵蒂冈也有朋友，可以给你仔细讲解梵蒂冈的政策以及各项指派和任命，说出当前哪个传教士正红运当头，哪个正走背字倒霉，最近哪个神学假设是可疑的，再不就是哪个耶稣会教士或哪个多明我修士处境艰难，或者是在他们四旬斋的演说中差点儿捅出娄子来，诸如此类的吧。

48
-

Mr Samgrass was a genealogist and a legitimist; he loved dispossessed royalty and knew the exact validity of the rival claims of the pretenders to many thrones; he was not a man of religious habit, but he knew more than most Catholics about their Church; he had friends in the Vatican and could talk at length of policy and appointments, saying which contemporary ecclesiastics were in good favour, which in bad, what recent theological hypothesis was suspect, and how this or that Jesuit or Dominican had skated on thin ice or sailed near the wind in his Lenten discourses.

49
-

他除了没有信仰，可以说什么都有。后来他还喜欢参加在布莱兹赫德的小教堂举行的祝祷礼，想看看这个家族中披着黑色头纱虔诚祝祷的夫人小姐们。他喜欢名门望族、上层人物的那些无人记起的丑闻，而且是一位判定族系、糅合关系的专家大咖。他宣称自己钟爱过去和往昔，可我总觉得他认为那些和他有着松散攀附联系的声名显赫的人——不管是活着还是死了的——多少总有那么一些不明所谓。只有他萨姆格拉斯先生是实打实存在的，其他的人不过浮云或过眼云烟罢了。

49
-

He had everything except the Faith, and later liked to attend benediction in the chapel of Brideshead and see the ladies of the family with their necks arched in devotion under their black lace mantillas; he loved forgotten scandals in high life and was an expert in putative parentage; he claimed to love the past, but I always felt that he thought all the splendid company, living or dead, with whom he associated slightly absurd; it was Mr Samgrass who was real, the rest were an insubstantial pageant.

50
-

他是去往维多利亚时代的时间旅行者，倨傲坚决，自以为是，一切异域风情都尽收他的眼底，供他欣赏怡情。在他学究气息强烈的态度里倒不失一点轻松活泼，我还心内存疑，想着说不定在他装了镶嵌板的某个地方藏着一部留声机。

50
-

He was the Victorian tourist, solid and patronizing, for whose amusement these foreign things were paraded. And there was something a little too brisk about his literary manners; I suspected the existence of a dictaphone somewhere in his panelled rooms.

51
-

我第一次碰见他的时候，他正和马奇梅因夫人在一起。当时我就想，和这么一位大知识分子在一起，她恐怕就再也没法子找到与自己具有更大反差的人了，也没法子找到更合适的陪衬人了。她渗入别人的生活时不会这么大张旗鼓、这么招摇的，这不是她的风格。但是快到周末的时候，塞巴斯蒂安夹枪带棒地说了一句：“你和我妈妈好像过从甚密啊。”此时我才意识到，她正迅速又悄无声息地，不动声色地将我拉拢进了某种亲密关系中——她不能忍受任何一种不亲密的关系。我在她离开时答应她，下次假期，除了圣诞节当天之外，都到布莱兹赫德去过。

51
-

He was with Lady Marchmain when I first met them, and I thought then that she could not have found a greater contrast to herself than this intellectual-on-the-make, nor a better foil to her own charm. It was not her way to make a conspicuous entry into anyone’s life, but towards the end of that week Sebastian said rather sourly: ‘You and mummy seem very thick,’ and I realized that in fact I was being drawn into intimacy by swift, imperceptible stages, for she was impatient of any human relationship that fell short of it. By the time that she left I had promised to spend all next vacation, except Christmas itself, at Brideshead.

52
-

过了一两个星期之后的一个星期一上午，我正在塞巴斯蒂安的房间里等他下课，这时茱丽娅走了进来，她后面还跟着一个身形高大的男人，茱丽娅介绍他是“莫特拉姆先生”，并且叫他“雷克斯”，说是开着汽车从他们度周末的人家来的。雷克斯·莫特拉姆穿着件格呢大衣，热情、自信；茱丽娅穿着皮草，冷淡、羞怯，她径直走向壁炉，蜷在那儿打着哆嗦。

52
-

One Monday morning a week or two later I was in Sebastian’s room waiting for him to return from a tutorial, when Julia walked in, followed by a large man whom she introduced as ‘Mr Mottram’ and addressed as ‘Rex’. They were motoring up from a house where they had spent the week-end, they explained. Rex Mottram was warm and confident in a check ulster; Julia cold and rather shy in furs; she made straight for the fire and crouched over it shivering.

53
-

“希望塞巴斯蒂安给我们安排一餐午饭。”她说，“要是不行的话，我们总还可以到博伊·马尔卡斯特那儿试试，可我总觉得在塞巴斯蒂安这儿会吃得好些，我们真饿坏了。在凯茨姆家度周末，就是一直在饿肚子。”

53
-

‘We hoped Sebastian might give us luncheon,’ she said. ‘Failing him we can always try Boy Mulcaster, but I somehow thought we should eat better with Sebastian, and we’re very hungry. We’ve been literally starved all the week-end at the Chasms.’

54
-

“博伊和塞巴斯蒂安两个人正要和我午餐。你们也一起来吧。”

54
-

‘He and Sebastian are both lunching with me. Come too.’

55
-

于是他们没有客气推辞就到我的屋里一起用午餐了，这算是我办的最后一回老式派对了。雷克斯·莫特拉姆豁出命去表现自己让人印象深刻。他长得很漂亮，一头黑发，发线低低地压在额头上，眉毛浓黑。他说话时带着很动听的加拿大口音。

55
-

So, without demur, they joined the party in my rooms, one of the last of the old kind that I gave. Rex Mottram exerted himself to make an impression. He was a handsome fellow with dark hair growing low on his forehead and heavy black eyebrows. He spoke with an engaging Canadian accent.

56
-

人们很快就意识到他希望别人知道他，知道他财运甚佳，知道他是国会议员、赌徒，是个好人；他经常和威尔士亲王打高尔夫、和“马克斯”、和“F.E.”、和“格尔蒂”·劳伦斯、和奥古斯塔斯·约翰以及和卡彭特也很有交情——总之和谁都有交情，似乎提起个什么人就跟他关系不错。可说到牛津时他却说：“不，我之前从来没来过。上了牛津大学就意味着你比别人迟三年开始你的人生。”

56
-

One quickly learned all that he wished one to know about him, that he was a lucky man with money, a member of parliament, a gambler, a good fellow; that he played golf regularly with the Prince of Wales and was on easy terms with ‘Max’ and ‘F.E.’ and ‘Gertie’ Lawrence and Augustus John and Carpentier - with anyone, it seemed, who happened to be mentioned. Of the University he said: ‘No, I was never here. It just means you start life three years behind the other fellow.’

57
-

他的人生，迄今为止，照他自己的话说，始于战争。战时他和加拿大人一同作战，得到了铁十字勋章，离开军队时，已经是一位著名将军的侍从武官了。

57
-

His life, so far as he made it known, began in the war, where he had got a good M.C.? serving with the Canadians and had ended as A.D.C. to a popular general.?

58
-

我们那时候见到的他，怎么样也超不过三十岁去，可是在牛津他就很显老了。茱丽娅对待他与对待世上其他人一样，总是有些轻慢的，却又带着些许占有意味。还吃着午饭，她就使唤他去汽车里给她取香烟，还有一两回他吹牛皮吹大发了，她就又为他辩解：“别忘了他是个上校。”听她这么说他则朗声大笑。

58
-

He cannot have been more than thirty at the time we met him, but he seemed very old to us in Oxford. Julia treated him, as she seemed to treat all the world, with mild disdain, but with an air of possession. During luncheon she sent him to the car for her cigarettes, and once or twice when he was talking very big, she apologized for him, saying: ‘Remember he’s a colonial,’ to which he replied with boisterous laughter.?

59
-

他走以后我问了这人是谁，什么来头。

59
-

When he had gone I asked who he was.

60
-

“欸，就是茱丽娅那边的什么人啊。”塞巴斯蒂安说。

60
-

‘Oh, just someone of Julia’s,’ said Sebastian.

61
-

让我们稍感惊讶的是，一周之后收到了他的电报，邀请我们和博伊·马尔卡斯特于第二天晚上参加“茱丽娅之派对”，在伦敦共进晚餐。

61
-

We were slightly surprised a week later to get a telegram from him asking us and Boy Mulcaster to dinner in London on the following night for ‘a party of Julia’s’. 

62
-

“我觉得他认识的人都不年轻，”塞巴斯蒂安说，“他的朋友似乎都是伦敦政商两界全身大厚皮的老鲨鱼。咱们去不去？”

62
-

‘I don’t think he knows anyone young,’ said Sebastian; ‘all his friends are leathery old sharks in the City and the House of Commons. Shall we go?’

63
-

我们商量了一会儿，因为这个时期我们在牛津的生活正阴郁黯淡着，所以我们决定去。

63
-

We discussed it, and because our life at Oxford was now so much in the shadows, we decided that we would.

64
-

“他干吗也要博伊去呢？”

64
-

‘Why does he want Boy?’

65
-

“茱丽娅和我从小就认识博伊。我猜是不是因为他看见博伊也和你一起吃午饭，所以把他当成你的好朋友了。”

65
-

‘Julia and I have known him all our lives. I suppose, finding him at lunch with you, he thought he was a chum.’

66
-

我们不太喜欢马尔卡斯特这个人，但是在核请好外宿假，坐着哈德卡斯尔的车子开上去伦敦的大路时，我们三个都兴高采烈的。

66
-

We had no great liking for Mulcaster, but the three of us were in high spirits when, having got leave for the night from our colleges, we drove off on the London road in Hardcastle’s car.

67
-

由于是夜要宿在马奇梅因府上，所以我们先到那儿去换了晚装，喝了瓶香槟，而且还串着看了看彼此的房间：都在三楼，与下边富丽堂皇的比起来，真心显得寒碜。我们下楼时，茱丽娅刚好经过，准备去她楼上的房间，她还穿着白天的衣服。

67
-

We were to spend the night at Marchmain House. We went there to dress and, while we dressed, drank a bottle of champagne, going in and out of one another’s rooms which were together three floors up and rather shabby compared with the splendours below.  As we came downstairs Julia passed us going up to her room still in her day clothes. 

68
-

“我要迟到了，”她说，“你们男孩子最好是去雷克斯那儿。你们能来可真是太好。”

68
-

‘I’m going to be late,’ she said; ‘you boys had better go on to Rex’s. It’s heavenly of you to come.’

69
-

“这个派对是要干吗？”

69
-

‘What is this party?’

70
-

“跟我有关的一个糟糕的慈善舞会。雷克斯坚持要为这舞会举行一个餐会……到那儿再见吧！”

70
-

‘A ghastly charity ball I’m involved with. Rex insisted on giving a dinner party for it.See you there.’

71
-

雷克斯·莫特拉姆就住在离马奇梅因公馆几步路的地方。

71
-

Rex Mottram lived within walking distance of Marchmain House.

72
-

“茱丽娅要晚一点才到，”我们说，“她才上楼换衣服。”

72
-

‘Julia’s going to be late,’ we said, ‘she’s only just gone up to dress.’

73
-

“这就是说怎么也还得一个小时，我们最好先喝些葡萄酒吧。”

73
-

‘That means an hour. We’d better have some wine.’

74
-

一位被介绍说是“查皮恩太太”的女人说：“雷克斯，我敢断定茱丽娅愿意我们先开始。”

74
-

A woman who was introduced as ‘Mrs Champion’ said: ‘I’m sure she’d sooner we started, Rex.’

75
-

“嗯，不管怎么着，先来些葡萄酒。”

75
-

‘Well, let’s have some wine first anyway.’

76
-

“干吗这么大一瓶呀，雷克斯？”她娇嗔一般地说，“什么东西你都总是想要大的。”

76
-

‘Why a Jeroboam, Rex?’ she said peevishly. ‘You always want to have everything too big.’

77
-

“对我们来说可不算大。”雷克斯一边说，一边把酒瓶拿在手里，旋开软木塞。

77
-

‘Won’t be too big for us,’ he said, taking the bottle in his own hands and easing the cork.

78
-

在座的还有两个跟茱丽娅一样年纪的女孩子。她们好像也被扯进来筹办这个舞会。马尔卡斯特老早就认识她们，而她们照我看想必对他没多大兴趣。查皮恩太太跟雷克斯聊着天，而塞巴斯蒂安和我就像往常那样，两人一起闷头喝酒。

78
-

There were two girls there, contemporaries of Julia’s; they all seemed involved in the management of the ball. Mulcaster knew them of old and they, without much relish I thought, knew him. Mrs Champion talked to Rex. Sebastian and I found ourselves drinking alone together as we always did.

79
-

茱丽娅终于来了，雍容华贵，仪态万千，并且丝毫没有抱歉的意思。“你们就不该让他等，”她说，“这是他的加拿大礼仪。”

79
-

At length Julia arrived, unhurried, exquisite, unrepentant. ‘You shouldn’t have let him wait,’ she said. ‘It’s his Canadian courtesy.’

80
-

雷克斯·莫特拉姆是一位慷慨殷勤的主人，餐毕，我们三个牛津来的学生都喝晕了。我们站在前厅等着姑娘们下来，雷克斯和查皮恩太太压着嗓子说着什么尖酸刻薄话儿走开了，此时马尔卡斯特说：“哎，我们还是别搭理这个倒霉的舞会了，上梅菲尔德大妈那儿去吧。”

80
-

Rex Mottram was a liberal host, and by the end of dinner the three of us who had come from Oxford were rather drunk. While we were standing in the hall waiting for the girls to come down and Rex and Mrs Champion had drawn away from us, talking, acrimoniously, in low voices, Mulcaster said, ‘I say, let’s slip away from this ghastly dance and go to Ma Mayfield’s.’

81
-

“梅菲尔德大妈又是什么人？”

81
-

‘Who is Ma Mayfield?’

82
-

“你知道梅菲尔德大妈的……谁不知道老一百号的梅菲尔德大妈呀。我认识常住那儿的一个叫艾菲的小甜妞儿。要是艾菲知道我到伦敦了，居然走过路过却没过去看她，那我可就没法儿做人了。走吧走吧，到梅菲尔德大妈那儿去见见小艾菲。”

82
-

‘You know Ma Mayfield. Everyone knows Ma Mayfield of the Old Hundredth. I’ve got a regular there - a sweet little thing called Effie. There’d be the devil to pay if Effie heard I’d been to London and hadn’t been in to see her. Come and meet Effie at Ma Mayfield’s.’

83
-

“好啦，”塞巴斯蒂安说，“那咱们就去梅菲尔德那儿见见艾菲吧。”

83
-

‘All right,’ said Sebastian, ‘let’s meet Effie at Ma Mayfield’s.’

84
-

“我们在好人莫特拉姆这儿再拿上一瓶酒，闪开那该死的舞会，然后就去老一百号，怎么样？”

84
-

‘We’ll take another bottle of pop off the good Mottram and then leave the bloody dance and go to the Old Hundredth. How about that?’

85
-

要从舞会脱身一点儿不难。雷克斯·莫特拉姆找来的姑娘们也来了很多朋友，大家一起跳了一两次舞以后，我们那张台子上已经堆满了酒，雷克斯·莫特拉姆要的酒越来越多……过了一会儿，我们三个就已经在街上了。

85
-

It was not a difficult matter to leave the ball; the girls whom Rex Mottram had collected had many friends there and, after we had danced together once or twice, our table began to fill up; Rex Mottram ordered more and more wine; presently the three of us were together on the pavement.

86
-

“你知道那地方在哪儿吗？”

86
-

‘D’you know where this place is?’

87
-

“当然知道了，百条排污渠大街么。”

87
-

‘Of course I do. A hundred Sink Street.’

88
-

“什么大街？”

88
-

‘Where’s that?’

89
-

“就在莱斯特广场那边。最好还是开车去。”

89
-

‘Just off Leicester Square. Better take the car.’

90
-

“为什么？”

90
-

‘Why?’

91
-

“这种场合，还是有自己的车子比较好些。”

91
-

‘Always better to have one’s own car on an occasion like this.’

92
-

我们没去深究他话里的意思，错也就错在没深究上了。那辆车子停在马奇梅因府邸前庭，距我们刚才跳舞的旅馆还不到一百码远。马尔卡斯特开着车，兜兜转转的，一会儿就把我们平安带到了排污渠大街。在一个漆黑的门廊前，一边站着一个穿制服的守门人，另一边站着一个穿晚礼服的中年男人，脸冲着墙，正把前额抵住墙砖冰镇降温。想必我们的目的地到了。

92
-

We did not question this reasoning, and there lay our mistake. The car was in the forecourt of Marchmain House within a hundred yards of the hotel where we had been dancing. Mulcaster drove and, after some wandering, brought us safely to Sink Street. A commissionaire at one side of a dark doorway and a middle-aged man in evening dress on the other side of it, standing with his face to the wall cooling his forehead on the bricks, indicated our destination.

93
-

“别往里进，你们会被荼毒的。”中年男人说。

93
-

‘Keep out, you’ll be poisoned,’ said the middle-aged man.

94
-

“是会员吗？”守门人问。

94
-

‘Members?’ said the commissionaire.

95
-

“大名是马尔卡斯特，”马尔卡斯特说，“马尔卡斯特子爵。”

95
-

‘The name is Mulcaster, ‘ said Mulcaster. ‘Viscount Mulcaster.’

96
-

“噢，进去试试看。”守门人说。

96
-

‘Well, try inside,’ said the commissionaire.

97
-

“你们会被洗劫的，中毒、被传染，被洗劫一空。”中年男人说。

97
-

‘You’ll be robbed, poisoned and infected and robbed,’ said the middle-aged man.

98
-

漆黑的大门里有一扇灯火明亮的小门。

98
-

Inside the dark doorway was a bright hatch.

99
-

“是会员吗？”一个穿着晚礼服、矮壮胖的女人问。

99
-

‘Members?’ asked a stout woman, in evening dress.

100
-

“这可真妙，”马尔卡斯特说，“现在你总该认识我了吧。”

100
-

‘I like that,’ said Mulcaster. ‘You ought to know me by now.’

101
-

“是啊，小亲亲，”那个女人全无兴趣的，“每人十先令。”

101
-

‘Yes, dearie,’ said the woman without interest. ‘Ten bob each.’

102
-

“嘿，慢着慢着，以前我可从没给过钱。”

102
-

‘Oh, look here, I’ve never paid before.’

103
-

“可不是么，小亲亲，是没给过。可今晚我们客满了，所以，十先令。你们之后再来的就得付一英镑。你们还是走运了呢。”

103
-

‘Daresay not, dearie. We’re full up tonight so it’s ten bob. Anyone who comes after you will have to pay a quid. You’re lucky.’

104
-

“请让我和梅菲尔德大妈讲话。”

104
-

‘Let me speak to Mrs Mayfield.’

105
-

“我就是梅菲尔德大妈啊。十先令，每位。”

105
-

‘I’m Mrs Mayfield. Ten bob each.’

106
-

“哦哟，原来是大妈呀，穿这么一身儿，我都认不出来了。你不认识我吗？我是博伊·马尔卡斯特。”

106
-

‘Why, Ma, I didn’t recognize you in your finery. You know Me, don’t you? Boy Mulcaster.’

107
-

“不错，小子。每位十先令。”

107
-

‘Yes, duckie. Ten bob each.’

108
-

我们给了钱，那个一直挡在我们和门间的男人才给我们让开了路。门内人声鼎沸，这时的老一百号正生意兴隆。我们找到了一张桌子，要了一瓶酒；侍者先把钱收了才把酒瓶盖打开。

108
-

We paid, and the man who had been standing between us and the inner door now made way for us. Inside it was hot and crowded, for the Old Hundredth was then at the height of its success. We found a table and ordered a bottle; the waiter took payment before he opened it.

109
-

“今天晚上艾菲在什么地方？”马尔卡斯特问。

109
-

‘Where’s Effie tonight?’ asked Mulcaster.

110
-

“哪个艾菲？”

110
-

‘Effie ‘oo?’

111
-

“艾菲呀，就是一直在这儿的姑娘啊，一个黑皮肤的小美妞儿。”

111
-

‘Effie, one of the girls who’s always here. The pretty dark one.’

112
-

“在这儿干活的姑娘多着呢，有黑的，有白的。你也可以说她们美，但我可没时间记她们的名字。”

112
-

‘There’s lots of girls works here. Some of them’s dark and some of them’s fair. You might call some of them pretty. I haven’t the time to know them by name.’

113
-

“我要去找她。”马尔卡斯特说。

113
-

‘I’ll go and look for her,’ said Mulcaster.

114
-

他甫一离开，就有两个姑娘在我们桌旁停下来，好奇地上下打量我们。

114
-

While he was away two girls stopped near our table and looked at us curiously.

115
-

“走吧，”其中一个对另一个说，“咱们会白白浪费时间的。两个娘娘腔。”

115
-

‘Come on,’ said one to the other, we’re wasting our time. They’re only fairies.’

116
-

不大一会儿，马尔卡斯特带着艾菲凯旋，侍者不用等着点单，就直接端了一份鸡蛋和熏肉过来。

116
-

Presently Mulcaster returned in triumph with Effie to whom, without its being ordered, the waiter immediately brought a plate of eggs and bacon.?

117
-

“整个晚上我这才吃头一口。”她说，“这里唯一称得上好的地方只是早餐，这么来回转悠真能饿得前胸贴后背呀。”

117
-

‘First bite I’ve had all the evening,’ she said. ‘Only thing that’s any good here is the breakfast; makes you fair peckish hanging about.’

118
-

“六先令。”侍者说道。

118
-

‘That’s another six bob,’ said the waiter.

119
-

艾菲填饱了肚子，拭了拭嘴，然后看向我们。

119
-

When her hunger was appeased, Effie dabbed her mouth and looked at us.

120
-

“我以前见过你，还经常见，是不是？”她对着我说。

120
-

‘I’ve seen you here before, often, haven’t I?’ she said to me.

121
-

“恐怕不会的。”

121
-

‘I’m afraid not.’

122
-

“那我总见过你吧？”她转向马尔卡斯特。

122
-

‘But I’ve seen you?’ to Mulcaster.

123
-

“呃，我倒想呢。难道你忘了我们九月的那个夜晚吗？”

123
-

‘Well, I should rather hope so. You haven’t forgotten our little evening in September?’

124
-

“没忘，亲爱的，当然不会忘了啊。你就是皇家卫队把自己的脚指头切了的那位吧？”

124
-

‘No, darling, of course not. You were the boy in the Guards who cut your toe, weren’t you?’

125
-

“艾菲，别耍我啦。”

125
-

‘Now, Effie, don’t be a tease.’

126
-

“不开玩笑。那就是别的晚上？我知道了——那回你正和班蒂在一起的吧，然后警察突然闯进来了，我们都躲到放垃圾箱的地方来着。”

126
-

‘No, that was another night, wasn’t it? I know - you were with Bunty the time the police were in and we all hid in the place they keep the dust-bins.’

127
-

“艾菲就喜欢拿我寻开心，是不是，艾菲？我这么长时间没来她生气了，是不是啊？”

127
-

‘Effie loves pulling my leg, don’t you, Effie? She’s annoyed with me for staying away so long, aren’t you?’

128
-

“你开心就好……反正我以前在哪儿见过你。”

128
-

‘Whatever you say, I know I have seen you before somewhere.’

129
-

“别开玩笑了。”

129
-

‘Stop teasing.’

130
-

“我可没有开玩笑的意思。真的。想跳舞吗？”

130
-

‘I wasn’t meaning to tease. Honest. Want to dance?’

131
-

“这会儿不想。”

131
-

‘Not at the minute.’

132
-

“谢天谢地。今天晚上我这双鞋子挤脚得很。”很快她就和马尔卡斯特聊得热火朝天了。塞巴斯蒂安往后一靠，对我说：“我去叫那两个过来。”

132
-

‘Thank the Lord. My shoes pinch something terrible tonight.’ Soon she and Mulcaster were deep in conversation. Sebastian leaned back and said to me: ‘I’m going to ask that pair to join us.’

133
-

那两个之前打望过我们的女孩子还没有找到主顾，现时又转回我们这里了。塞巴斯蒂安微笑着起身招呼她们，不久她们也畅快地大快朵颐起来。其中一个姑娘长着副骷髅样的细瘦脸孔，另一位则是病恹恹的娃娃脸。骷髅头似乎注定归我了。“咱们来一个小型派对怎么样？”她说道，“就我们六个人，上我那儿去？”

133
-

The two unattached women who had considered us earlier, were again circling towards us. Sebastian smiled and rose to greet them: soon they, too, were eating heartily. One had the face of a skull, the other of a sickly child. The Death’s Head seemed destined for me. ‘How about a little party,’ she said, ‘just the six of us over at my place?’

134
-

“好啊。”塞巴斯蒂安说。

134
-

‘Certainly,’ said Sebastian.

135
-

“你们刚进来时我们还觉得你们女里女气的呢。”

135
-

‘We thought you were fairies when you came in.’

136
-

“这是因为我们超级年轻。”

136
-

‘That was our extreme youth.’

137
-

骷髅头笑得咯儿咯儿的。“你可真是个讨人喜欢的家伙。”她说。

137
-

Death’s Head giggled. ‘You’re a good sport,’ she said.

138
-

“你们真可爱，”那个病娃娃脸说，“得跟梅菲尔德大妈说一声我们要出去。”

138
-

‘You’re very sweet really,’ said the Sickly Child. ‘I must just tell Mrs Mayfield we’re going out.’

139
-

那时还早，午夜才过不久，我们又来到街上。守门人试图游说我们搭出租车走，便说：“我会照看好你们的车子的，先生，我不会把车开走的，先生，我真的不会。”

139
-

It was still early, not long after midnight, when we regained the street. The commissionaire tried to persuade us to take a taxi. ‘I’ll look after your car, sir, I wouldn’t drive yourself, sir, really I wouldn’t.’

140
-

可是塞巴斯蒂安抓住了方向盘，两个女孩子坐在副驾驶座上给他指路，一个坐在另一个身上。艾菲、马尔卡斯特和我坐在后排。车子开动了，我觉得我们还欢呼了一声。

140
-

But Sebastian took the wheel and the two women sat one on the other beside him, to show him the way. Effie and Mulcaster and I sat in the back. I think we cheered a little as we drove off.

141
-

并没开出多远去。拐进沙夫茨伯里大道，正要往皮卡迪利大道拐时，险些和迎头开来的一辆出租车撞上，两辆车堪堪错开。

141
-

We did not drive far. We turned into Shaftesbury Avenue and were making for Piccadilly when we narrowly escaped a head-on collision with a taxi-cab. 

142
-

“看在基督的份上，”艾菲说，“您倒看着点儿路啊。你想害死我们呀？”

142
-

‘For Christ’s sake, ‘ said Effie, ‘look where you’re going. D’you want to murder us all?’

143
-

“是那家伙粗心大意。”塞巴斯蒂安说。

143
-

‘Careless fellow that,’ said Sebastian.

144
-

“你这样子开车可真不靠谱。”骷髅头说，“再说了，我们想必开也应该在路的那边开才对。”

144
-

‘It isn’t safe the way you’re driving,’ said Death’s Head. ‘Besides, we ought to be on the other side of the road.’

145
-

“是该靠那边开。”塞巴斯蒂安说着，猛然愣嗑嗑地把车一把甩到马路另一边。

145
-

‘So we should,’ said Sebastian, swinging abruptly across.

146
-

“哎哟，停车。我走路好了。”

146
-

‘Here, stop. I’d sooner walk.’

147
-

“要停车？没问题。”

147
-

‘Stop? Certainly.’

148
-

他一踩刹车，车子猛地停住，一竿子杵在马路当中。两个警察三步并作两步地朝我们过来了。

148
-

He put on the brakes and we came abruptly to a halt broadside across the road. Two policemen quickened their stride and approached us.

149
-

“让我出去。”艾菲说着，跳出车一溜烟地逃掉了。

149
-

‘Let me out of this,’ said Effie, and made her escape with a leap and a scamper.

150
-

剩下我们几个给逮个正着。

150
-

The rest of us were caught.

151
-

“要是我妨碍了交通的话，真是很抱歉，警察先生。”塞巴斯蒂安小心翼翼地说，“不过那位女士非让我停车让她下去不可。她绝对不会否认我这话。你们也看到了，她赶时间呢……你知道谁都有个内急的时候。”

151
-

‘I’m sorry if I am impeding the traffic, officer,’ said Sebastian with care, ‘but the lady insisted on my stopping for her to get out. She would take no denial. As you will have observed, she was pressed for time. A matter of nerves you know.’

152
-

“让我跟他说说。”骷髅头说，“多漂亮的好小伙子啊。这儿除了你们没有别人。这几个孩子并没存着坏心眼要干坏事。回头我会给他们叫辆出租车，妥妥地送他们回家就好了。”

152
-

‘Let me talk to him, ‘ said Death’s Head. ‘Be a sport, handsome; no one’s seen anything but you. The boys don’t mean any harm. I’ll get them into a taxi and see them home quiet.’

153
-

两个警察故意审慎地查看了我们一番，暗里思忖着要拿我们怎么办。本来可以大事化小小事化无这事就过去了，如果马尔卡斯特不插那句嘴的话。“哎哎，好心的二位老大，”他说，“没必要盯着我们不放吧。我们是刚刚从梅菲尔德大妈那儿来的。我敢肯定她给了你们一大笔钱好让二位睁一只眼闭一只眼的。好了好了，你们现在就可以闭一只眼了……绝不会有什么损失的。”

153
-

The policemen looked us over, deliberately, forming their own judgement. Even then everything might have been well had not Mulcaster joined in. ‘Look here, my good man,’ he said. ‘There’s no need for you to notice anything. We’ve just come from Ma Mayfield’s. I reckon she pays you a nice retainer to keep your eyes shut. Well, you can keep ‘em shut on us too, and you won’t be the losers by it.’

154
-

他那一番说话可能打消了警察先生所有的疑问。没多大工夫我们就进了班房。

154
-

That resolved any doubts which the policemen may have felt. In a short time we were in the cells.

155
-

我记不太起是怎么去的，也记不太起是怎么进去的。我想马尔卡斯特表示了强烈抗议，当把我们的口袋都给掏空了的时候，他又指控人家监狱看守偷他东西。随后我们就被关起来了。我能清楚回忆起的第一个就是贴满瓷砖的墙，一盏厚玻璃灯挂在很高的地方，有张床铺，靠我这边还有扇没有门把手的门。在我左侧的某个地方，塞巴斯蒂安和马尔卡斯特正在跳着脚破口大骂。

155
-

I remember little of the journey there or the process of admission. Mulcaster, I think, protested vigorously and, when we were made to empty our pockets, accused his gaolers of theft. Then we were locked in, and my first clear memory is of tiled walls with a lamp set high up under thick glass, a bunk, and a door which had no handle on my side. Somewhere to the left of me Sebastian and Mulcaster were raising Cain. 

156
-

在被送到看守所的路上时，塞巴斯蒂安还稳稳当当、十分镇静的样子，而此时被关在牢里头，他好像也震怒狂乱开了，一边咣咣地捶门，一边大声叫喊：“去你的，我没醉。给我开门！我必须看医生。告诉你们，我没醉！”与此同时，马尔卡斯特在另一边的牢房里叫嚷道：“上帝啊，非得跟你们算总账不可！我可告诉你，你们大错特错麻烦大了。给内务大臣打电话去。把我的私人律师找来。我可是有人身保护权的！”

156
-

Sebastian had been steady on his legs and fairly composed on the way to the station; now, shut in, he seemed in a frenzy and was pounding the door, and. shouting: ‘Damn you, I’m not drunk. Open this door. I insist on seeing the doctor. I tell you I’m not drunk,’ while Mulcaster, beyond, cried: ‘My God, you’ll pay for this! You’re making a great mistake, I can ‘tell you. Telephone the Home Secretary. Send for my solicitors. I will have habeas corpus.’

157
-

从别的牢房传来了流浪汉和扒手们一阵抗议的大吼，咆哮着抱怨吵得睡不着觉：“嘿！嘿！安静点儿！”“你们能不能不吵吵嚷嚷的？”“这是该死的拘留所，还是疯人院啊？”来回巡视的警察透过铁栅栏门警告他们：“还清醒不过来，就在这儿蹲一整夜吧。”

157
-

Groans of protest rose from the other cells where various tramps and pickpockets were trying to get some sleep: ‘Aw, pipe down!’ ‘Give a man some peace, can’t yer?’...’Is this a blinking lock-up or a looney-house?’ - and the sergeant, going his rounds, admonished them through the grille. ‘You’ll be here all night if you don’t sober up.’

158
-

我蔫头耷脑地坐在铺上，打了一会儿盹。过了一会儿，吵嚷的声音慢慢减弱了，听见塞巴斯蒂安喊：“喂，查尔斯，你在那边吗？”

158
-

I sat on the bunk in low spirits and dozed a little. Presently the racket subsided and Sebastian called: ‘I say, Charles, are you there?’

159
-

“我在这儿。”

159
-

‘Here I am.’

160
-

“这事可真糟透了。”

160
-

‘This is the hell of a business.’

161
-

“我们不能保释什么的吗？”

161
-

‘Can’t we get bail or something?’

162
-

马尔卡斯特好像已经睡着了。

162
-

Mulcaster seemed to have fallen asleep.

163
-

“我告诉你哪个人能保释我们——雷克斯·莫特拉姆，他在这儿有的是办法。”

163
-

‘I tell you the man - Rex Mottram. He’d be in his element here.’

164
-

但我们跟他联系上还是颇为周折麻烦的。我打铃叫人，过了半个小时，值班的警察才挪步而来问什么事。最后他终于半信半疑地同意给那家正在举办舞会的旅馆打个电话，总之是吃不准的样子。等的过程中又不知道过去了多久，我们的牢房门才终于给打开了。

164
-

We had some difficulty in getting in touch with him; it was half an hour before the policeman in charge answered my bell. At last he consented, rather sceptically, to send a telephone message to the hotel where the ball was being held. There was another long delay and then our prison doors were opened.

165
-

有一支哈瓦那雪茄所散发出的甜蜜浓郁，慢慢从警察局污秽混浊的空气中——混着污垢和消毒水的酸味——渗透过来，是两支哈瓦那雪茄，当班的警官在吸着另一支。

165
-

Seeping through the squalid air of the police station, the sour smell of dirt and disinfectant, came the sweet, rich smoke of a Havana cigar - of two Havana cigars, for the sergeant in charge was smoking also.

166
-

雷克斯站在值班室里的画面，活脱儿就是一出滑稽剧——他看上去委实就是权力和成功的化身。雷克斯穿着件阿斯特拉罕大翻领皮大衣，戴着一顶大礼帽。而警官们毕恭毕敬的，显示出时刻乐意效劳的模样。

166
-

Rex stood in the charge-room looking the embodiment indeed, the burlesque - of power and prosperity; he wore a fur-lined overcoat with broad astrakhan lapels and a silk hat. The police were deferential and eager to help. 

167
-

“我们必须得公事公办。”他们说，“把这几位年轻先生关起来也是为了保护他们。”

167
-

‘We had to do our duty,’ they said. ‘Took the young gentlemen into custody for their own protection.’

168
-

马尔卡斯特看来已经醉得神志不清了，乱七八糟地抱怨着他被剥夺了各种合法权益，陈述权和公民权，等等。雷克斯说：“最好还是把话留着跟我说吧。”

168
-

Mulcaster looked crapulous and began a confused complaint that he had been denied legal representation and civil rights. Rex said: ‘Better leave all the talking to me.’

169
-

这时我的脑子清醒多了，饶有兴趣地看着、听着雷克斯去解决问题。他检视了案卷笔录，然后态度亲和地与那两位逮了我们的警察说起话来。他以最不易察觉的手法试图贿赂，但在看出这件事拖得时间太久、流传得太广的时候，就赶快拿话遮掩过去不再提了。他担保第二天上午十点把我们送到地方法院之后就把我们带走了。他的汽车就停在外面。

169
-

I was clear-headed now and watched and listened with fascination while Rex settled our business. He examined the charge sheets, spoke affably to the men who had made the arrest; with the slightest perceptible nuance he opened the way for bribery and quickly covered it when he saw that things had now lasted too long and the knowledge had been too widely shared; he undertook to deliver us at the magistrate’s court at ten next morning, and then led us away. His car was outside.?

170
-

“今天晚上讨论什么也没有用。你们在哪儿睡？”

170
-

‘It’s no use discussing things tonight. Where are you sleeping.?’

171
-

“马奇梅因家。”塞巴斯蒂安说。

171
-

‘Marchers, ‘ said Sebastian.

172
-

“那你们最好还是到我这儿来吧。今天晚上我可以安顿你们。把事情都交给我吧。”

172
-

‘You’d better come to me. I can fix you up for tonight. Leave everything to me.’

173
-

显然他相当得意于自己的办事效率。

173
-

It was plain that he rejoiced in his efficiency.

174
-

翌日清晨的表演给人的印象则越发深刻。我一觉醒来，先是错愕懵懂地发现自己睡在一间陌生的房间里，瞬间恢复意识，回想起头天夜里的事情起先还以为是发了场噩梦，然后才明白它就是现实。雷克斯的仆人正在收拾衣箱，他看到我醒了，就走到洗面台前把什么东西从一个瓶子倒在杯子里。“我想我把所有您的物品都从马奇梅因公馆给您拿过来了，”他说，“是莫特拉姆先生派人去赫佩尔药店把这个买回来的。”

174
-

Next morning the display was even more impressive. I awoke with the startled and puzzled sense of being in a strange room, and in the first seconds of consciousness the memory of the evening before returned, first as though of a nightmare, then of reality.  Rex’s valet was unpacking a suitcase. On seeing me move he went to the wash-hand stand and poured something from a bottle. ‘I think I have everything from Marchmain House,’ he said. ‘Mr Mottram sent round to Heppell’s for this.’

175
-

我吃了药之后感觉好多了。

175
-

I took the draught and felt better.

176
-

屋里还有一位从特朗泊理发店来的技师候着给我们刮脸。

176
-

A man was there from Trumper’s to shave us.

177
-

雷克斯和我们一道吃的早餐。“出庭时要紧的是外表看起来得像样，”他说，“幸亏你们穿得还不算太坏。”

177
-

Rex joined us at breakfast. ‘It’s important to make a good appearance at the court,’ he said. ‘Luckily none of you look much the worse for wear.’

178
-

早饭后，律师也来了，雷克斯简明扼要地跟他讲了情况。

178
-

After breakfast the barrister arrived and Rex delivered a summary of the case.?

179
-

“塞巴斯蒂安脱不开身了，”他说，“就因为酒后驾驶，很有可能被判罪，最多会判到六个月监禁。最倒霉的是，你们这案子是由格列格审理。他对这类案子向来十分严苛。所以，我们今天上午能做的就是请求推迟开庭一周，留作给塞巴斯蒂安辩护的万全准备。你们俩就表示认罪，承认自己做得不对，付五先令罚金完事。至于打点那些晚报的事情么，我还得想想怎么办才好……《星报》可能要费些事儿。

179
-

‘Sebastian’s in a jam,’ he said. ‘He’s liable to anything up to six months’ imprisonment for being drunk in charge of a car. You’ll come up before Grigg unfortunately. He takes rather a grim view of cases of this sort. All that will happen this morning is that we shall ask to have Sebastian held over for a week to prepare the defence. You two will plead guilty, say you’re sorry, and pay your five bob fine. I’ll see what can be done about squaring the evening papers. The Star may be dffficult.?

180
-

“记住，关键是绝口不提老一百号的事。幸亏那几个女的还算清醒，没受什么指控，可是作为目击证人，她们的名字业已记录在案了。我们要是否认警察的证词的话，法庭就会传唤她们。我们无论如何也要避免付这种代价，所以得硬着头皮全盘接受警察那边的说辞，然后请求地方法院大发慈悲，不要因为年轻人偶然的一次轻率举止就断送掉其大好的前程。这样做会有作用的。我们还得找一位牛津大学的老师证明你们品行端正。茱丽娅告诉我说，你们正好有一位萨姆格拉斯老师。他应该可以给你们作证。另外，你们要简短地说明：你们是从牛津来的，是去参加了一个体体面面的舞会，因为不习惯喝葡萄酒却喝多了，所以开车回家时才迷了路出了岔子。

180
-

‘Remember, the important thing is to keep out all mention of the Old Hundredth.? Luckily the tarts were sober and aren’t being charged, but their names have been taken as witnesses. If we try and break down the police evidence, they’ll be called. We’ve got to avoid that at all costs, so we shall have to swallow the police story whole and appeal to the magistrate’s good nature not to wreck a young man’s career for a single boyish indiscretion. It’ll work all right. We shall need a don to give evidence of good character.? Julia tells me you have a tame one called Samgrass. He’ll do. Meanwhile your story is simply that you came up from Oxford for a perfectly respectable dance, weren’t used to wine, had too much, and lost the way driving home.

181
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“这件事办完了以后，我们还得想办法和你们牛津大学校方把这件事通融通融。”

181
-

‘After that we shall have to see about fixing things with your authorities at Oxford.’

182
-

“我告诉他们把我的律师找来的，”马尔卡斯特说，“可他们硬是拒绝了。他们没指望了，错得没边没沿了。我倒要看看他们怎么脱身。”

182
-

‘I told them to call my solicitors,’ said Mulcaster, ‘and they refused. They’ve put themselves hopelessly in the wrong, and I don’t see why they should get away with it.’

183
-

“看在上帝的份上，千万别再挑事儿了。你就认罪，缴罚金了事。懂了？”

183
-

‘For heaven’s sake don’t start any kind of argument. Just plead guilty and pay up.Understand?’

184
-

马尔卡斯特咕哝着，不过还是同意了。

184
-

Mulcaster grumbled but submitted.

185
-

法庭上的情形果然不出雷克斯所料。十点半钟，我们已经站在鲍街上了，我和马尔卡斯特已经恢复自由身了，塞巴斯蒂安则要具保候审，等过一个星期再度出庭。马尔卡斯特对自己的冤屈一直保持了沉默。我和他受到了告警，每人罚款五先令，还有十五先令的诉讼费用。我们越来越不喜欢马尔卡斯特，所以听到他找借口说要去伦敦办事时，我们都如释重负一般大大舒了一口气。律师也匆匆离开了，只剩下我和塞巴斯蒂安，满腹心事老大不痛快。

185
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Everything happened at court as Rex had predicted. At half past ten we stood in Bow Street, Mulcaster and I free men, Sebastian bound over to appear in a week’s time.  Mulcaster had kept silent about his grievance; he and I were admonished and fined five shillings each and fifteen shillings costs. Mulcaster was becoming rather irksome to us, and it was with relief that we heard his plea of other business in London. The barrister bustled off and Sebastian and I were left alone and disconsolate. 

186
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“我估计妈妈肯定已经听说这件事了。”他说，“该死，该死，真该死！太冷了。我不愿回家，但也没地方可去。干脆我们溜回牛津吧，等他们找上门来再说。”

186
-

‘I suppose mummy’s got to hear about it,’ he said. ‘Damn, damn, damn! It’s cold. I won’t go home. I’ve nowhere to go. Let’s just slip back to Oxford and wait for them to bother us.’

187
-

一些惯于出入法庭的声名狼藉的常客走进去走出来，在台阶上走上去走下来的。而我们还站在街角吹冷风，左右犹豫着拿不定主意。

187
-

The raffish habitués of the police court came and went, up and down the steps; still we stood on the windy comer, undecided.

188
-

“干吗不去找茱丽娅呢？”

188
-

‘Why not get hold of Julia?’

189
-

“那我八成要出国了。”

189
-

‘I might go abroad.’

190
-

“我亲爱的塞巴斯蒂安，你无非就是被人训一通，罚几英镑钱罢了。”

190
-

‘My dear Sebastian, you’ll only be given a talking-to and fined a few pounds.’

191
-

“是啊，可是烦人的是我妈，布赖德，家里的所有人，还有学监和老师……我索性到监狱待着更好。如果我溜到国外去，他们就没法子把我弄回来了吧？被警察追逃时，不是谁都这么干么？我知道我妈会做出一副让大家觉得我们的事都要她一人承担的样子来，都着落在她身上了。”

191
-

‘Yes, but it’s all the bother - mummy and Bridey and all the family and the dons. I’d sooner go to prison. If I just slip away abroad they can’t get me back, can they? That’s what people do when the police are after them. I know mummy will make it seem she has to bear the whole brunt of the business.’

192
-

“还是给茱丽娅打个电话，让她到什么地方碰个头，咱们再好好商量一下这件事吧。”

192
-

‘Let’s telephone Julia and get her to meet us somewhere and talk it over.’

193
-

我们在伯克利街的冈特餐厅见的面。茱丽娅和当时的大多数女人一样，戴着顶压到眉端的绿色帽子，帽子上镶着一颗箭形钻石，怀里抱着一只小狗，小狗四分之三的身体都藏在她皮毛大衣里。她跟我们招呼，少有地表现出非常有兴趣的样子。

193
-

We met at Gunter’s in Berkeley Square. Julia, like most women then, wore a green hat pulled down to her eyes with a diamond arrow in it; she had a small dog under her arm, three-quarters buried in the fur of her coat. She greeted us with an unusual show of interest.

194
-

“嘿，你们真是一对捣蛋鬼。我不得不说你们干这种事还挺在行的呢。我要是喝醉了，第二天就整个瘫痪了。我还以为你们可能会带我一块儿去的呢——那个舞会实在是讨厌得要命，而我一直盼望着能有机会去老一百号玩玩呢……只不过无论如何不会有人带我去的。那里是‘天上人间’吧？”

194
-

‘Well, you are a pair of pickles; I must say you look remarkably well on it. The only time I got tight I was paralysed all the next day. I do think you might have taken me with you. The ball was positively lethal, and I’ve always longed to go to the Old Hundredth. No one will ever take me. Is it heaven?’

195
-

“这么说来这事儿你也知道了？”

195
-

‘So you know all about that, too?’

196
-

“早上雷克斯给我打电话了，把什么都告诉我了。你们那两个女朋友长什么样子？”

196
-

‘Rex telephoned me this morning and told me everything. What were your girl friends like?’

197
-

“别那么猥琐好吗？”塞巴斯蒂安说。

197
-

‘Don’t be prurient,’ said Sebastian.

198
-

“我那个是骷髅头。”

198
-

‘Mine was like a skull.’

199
-

“我那个像痨病鬼。”

199
-

‘Mine was like a consumptive.’

200
-

“天啊。”我们也是带女人出去玩过的人，这件事显然拔高了我们在茱丽娅心目中的地位。她的兴趣全在那两个女人身上。

200
-

‘Goodness.’ It had clearly raised us in Julia’s estimation that we had been out with women; to her they were the point of interest.

201
-

“妈妈知道了吗？”

201
-

‘Does mummy know?’

202
-

“只差知道骷髅头和痨病鬼。她知道你们进监狱了。我告诉她的。当然了，这种事她很能看得开，真是这样的。你知道，内德叔叔做任何事都完美无瑕没什么可挑剔的吧，就有一次他因为带着一只熊进了劳埃德·乔治主持的什么会议就给关起来了，也就因为这，她认为这个事情实属人之常情。她希望你们俩和她一道吃饭。”

202
-

‘Not about your skulls and consumptives. She knows you were in the clink. I told her.  She was divine about it, of course. You know anything Uncle Ned did was always perfect, and he got locked up once for taking a bear into one of Lloyd George’s meetings, so she really feels quite human about the whole thing. She wants you both to lunch with her.’

203
-

“啊，天哪！”

203
-

‘Oh God!’

204
-

“麻烦的是小报和家里其他人。查尔斯，你们家什么情况？”

204
-

‘The only trouble is the papers and the family. Have you got an awful family, Charles?’

205
-

“我家只有我父亲一个人，可他绝不会听到这件事的。”

205
-

‘Only a father. He’ll never hear about it.’

206
-

“那我们这一家子可麻烦极了。家里有那样一些亲戚，我可怜的妈眼睁睁看着就要倒霉了。他们明里要写信来，还要登门拜访，表示同情，可暗里有一半人心里念叨的是：‘看，这就是把孩子养成一个天主教徒的结果。’另一半人就会说：‘这就是送孩子去伊顿公学而不是送到斯托尼赫斯特的结果。’可怜的妈妈百口莫辩，扭转不过来的。”

206
-

‘Ours are awful. Poor mummy is in for a ghastly time with them. They’ll be writing letters and paying visits of sympathy, and all the time at the back of their minds one half will be saying, “That’s what comes of bringing the boy up a Catholic,” and the other half will say, “That’s what comes of sending him to Eton instead of Stonyhurst.” Poor mummy can’t get it right.

207
-

我们和马奇梅因夫人一起吃的午餐。她很幽默，无可奈何地接受了我们这件事。她只责备地说了一句：“我想不出你们为什么出去以及为什么拉上莫特拉姆先生。你们本可以一开始就来找我，把这件事告诉我的啊。”

207
-

We lunched with Lady Marchmain. She accepted the whole thing with humorous resignation. Her only reproach was: ‘I can’t think why you went off and stayed with Mr Mottram. You might have come and told me about it first.’

208
-

“我怎么把这件事跟全家人解释呢？”她问道，“倘若他们看到我对这件事还不如他们难过，想必一定非常震惊。你知道我的嫂子范妮·罗斯康芒吧？她一向认为我把孩子教坏了。现在我才开始觉得她说得没错。”

208
-

‘How am I going to explain it to all the family?’ she asked. ‘They will be so shocked to find that they’re more upset about it than I am. Do you know my sister-in-law, Fanny Rosscommon? She has always thought I brought the children up badly. Now I am beginning to think she must be right.’

209
-

我们离开时我说：“你妈妈实在是太好不过了。你还在发哪门子愁呢？”

209
-

When we left I said: ‘She couldn’t have been more charming. What were you so worried about?’

210
-

“我也说不上个原因来。”塞巴斯蒂安惨兮兮地说。

210
-

‘I can’t explain,’ said Sebastian miserably.

211
-

一周之后，塞巴斯蒂安再次出庭，被罚款十英镑。报纸把这则消息登在令人难受的显著位置，有一家报纸还用了极具讽刺意味的标题：“侯爵之子不习惯喝葡萄酒”。地方法官说，没有重判仅仅是由于警察的行动果决……

211
-

A week later when Sebastian came up for trial he was fined ten pounds. The newspapers reported it with painful prominence, one of them under the ironic headline:‘Marquis’s son unused to wine’. The magistrate said that it was only through the prompt action of the police that he was not up on a grave charge.

212
-

“你不用承担严重责任事故的罪责，纯属好运……”萨姆格拉斯先生作证说，塞巴斯蒂安其人其品行是无可挑剔的，还说他在牛津大学的光明前途已经因此事蒙羞而黯淡起来。报纸抓住了这句话大做文章——“模范学生前景堪忧”。同样，对于萨姆格拉斯的证言，法官大人却有自己的一套说辞，他是无论有无品行证言，都会拿塞巴斯蒂安杀鸡儆猴的，法律面前，人人平等，对一个牛津大学的大学生和任何一个小流氓均是一视同仁的；毫无疑问，家世越好，这样的作奸犯科就越丢人现眼……

212
-

‘It is purely by good fortune that you do not bear the responsibility of a serious accident...’ Mr Samgrass gave evidence that Sebastian bore an irreproachable character and that a brilliant future at the University was in jeopardy. The papers took hold of this too - ‘Model Student’s Career at Stake. But for Mr Samgrass’s evidence, said the magistrate, he would have been disposed to give an exemplary sentence; the law was the same for an Oxford undergraduate as for any young hooligan; indeed the better the home the more shameful the offence...

213
-

萨姆格拉斯先生所奉献的价值并不仅只在鲍街上体现出来，在牛津大学他表现出的全部热情和机敏也与雷克斯·莫特拉姆在伦敦所表现出的别无二致。他拜访了学校领导层、学监和副校长。他还撺掇管理员贝尔去拜访了基督教会学院院长，并且安排了马奇梅因夫人与校长长谈……此一套下来努力的结果是在这学期剩下的日子里，禁止我们三个出校门。

213
-

It was not only at Bow Street that Mr Samgrass was of value. At Oxford he showed all the zeal and acumen which were Rex Mottram’s in London. He interviewed the college authorities, the proctors, the Vice-Chancellor; he induced Mgr Bell to call on the Dean of Christ Church; he arranged for Lady Marchmain to talk to the Chancellor himself; and, as a result of all this, the three of us were gated for the rest of the term. 

214
-

哈德卡斯尔也不清不楚为了什么，再次被剥夺了使用自己那辆汽车的权利，这样，这件事也就算过去了。我们所遭受到最难挨惩罚倒是同雷克斯·莫特拉姆和萨姆格拉斯先生之间的亲密关系，好在雷克斯生活在伦敦的政界和金融界上游，可萨姆格拉斯却生活在牛津，与我们低头不见抬头见的，所以从他那儿受的罪就更大。

214
-

Hardcastle, for no clear reason, was again deprived of the use of his car, and the affair blew over. The most lasting penalty we suffered was our intimacy with Rex Mottram and Mr Samgrass, but since Rex’s life was in London in a world of politics and high finance and Mr Samgrass’s nearer to our own at Oxford, it was from him we suffered the more.

215
-

在这个学期剩下的日子里，他算跟我们摽上了，一直过来烦人。由于我们被禁了足，所以晚上也不能一起过，从九点起，我们都得各在一处，都要视萨姆格拉斯的鼻息仰止。几乎没有断过哪一个晚上，他不是来找我就是去找塞巴斯蒂安。他一说起“我们的那次小出轨”时，就好像他也被关在牢里，跟我们有什么瓜葛一样……

215
-

For the rest of that term he haunted us. Now that we were ‘gated’ we could not spend our evenings together, and from nine 0’clock onwards were alone and at Mr Samgrass’s mercy. Hardly an evening seemed to paw but he called on one o r the other of us. He spoke of ‘our little escapade’ as though he, too, had been in the cells, and had that bond with us...

216
-

有一次我翻墙出了学院，关了校门之后，结果萨姆格拉斯先生还是在塞巴斯蒂安的房间里找到了我，这事使得他变成跟我也有了瓜葛。所以当我圣诞节后到了布莱兹赫德，迈步进入他们称为“挂毯大厅”的那个房间，看到萨姆格拉斯先生时一点儿都不惊讶。他独自坐在壁炉前，似乎是在等我的样子。

216
-

Once I climbed out of college and Mr Samgrass found me in Sebastian’s rooms after the gate was shut and that, too, he made into a bond. It did not surprise me, therefore, when I arrived at Brideshead, after Christmas, to find Mr Samgrass, as though in wait for me, sitting alone before the fire in the room they called the ‘Tapestry Hall’.?

217
-

“你看我独占这间房间了。”他说。他确实将这厅堂，将四周挂满灰暗的狩猎场面的挂毯，将壁炉两边的女像柱都据为己有了。当他起身像个主人一样欢迎我的时候，连我也好像被他占有了。

217
-

‘You find me in solitary possession,’ he said, and indeed he seemed to possess the hall and the sombre scenes of venery that hung round it, to possess the caryatids on either side of the fireplace, to possess me, as he rose to take my hand and greet me like a host.

218
-

“今天早晨，”他继续说，“我们在草坪上举行了马奇梅因家狩猎派对——妙极了，古风十足哪——所有年轻的朋友都去猎狐了，甚至塞巴斯蒂安也穿上他那件粉红外套，看上去优雅极了——你不会吃惊的吧。而布莱兹赫德呢，与其说是优雅，倒不如说是让人印象深刻。他和这里一个很有趣的人物，叫沃尔特·斯特里克兰-维纳布尔斯爵士的，联手当主持人。希望这些无聊乏味的挂毯里能把他们两人的肖像绣上，那这挂毯可就妙极了。

218
-

‘This morning,’ he continued, ‘we had a lawn meet of the Marchmain Hounds - a deliciously archaic spectacle and all our young friends are fox-hunting, even Sebastian who, you will not be surprised to hear, looked remarkably elegant in his pink coat.  Brideshead was impressive rather than elegant; he is joint-master with a local figure of fun named Sir Walter Strickland-Venables. I wish the two of them could be included in these rather humdrum tapestries - they would give a note of fantasy. 

219
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“我们的女主人在家里留守了，另外还有一位正在养病的多明我派教士，他谈马利坦[6]谈得太多，可读黑格尔又读得太少；还有亚德里安·波森爵士，当然，还有两位令人望而却步的匈牙利表兄弟——我试着用德语和法语跟他们讲话，可他们对哪种语言都没有所谓。现在这些人都坐车上邻居家做客去了。我就一个人坐在壁炉前，和无与伦比的夏尔吕斯[7]好好消磨了一个舒舒服服的下午，妙不可言哪。看见你来了，我才有勇气拉铃叫人送茶过来。我怎么帮你为赴宴做准备呢？

[6]法国神学家。[7]马塞尔·普鲁斯特所著《追忆似水年华》中的人物。
219
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‘Our hostess remained at home; also a convalescent Dominican who has read too much Maritain and too little Hegel; Sir Adrian Porson, of course, and two rather forbidding Magyar cousins - I have tried them in German and in French, but in neither tongue are they diverting. All these have now driven off to visit a neighbour. I have been spending a cosy afternoon before the fire with the incomparable Charlus. Your arrival emboldens me to ring for some tea. How can I prepare you for the party?

220
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哎呀，明天就要散了。茱丽娅小姐到别的地方去跨年，也就是把摩登的人物都带走了。我就见不到附近的美人了——特别是那个西莉娅，她是我们那个倒霉的老伙计博伊·马尔卡斯特的妹妹，可神奇地一点儿也不像他。她说起话来就像小鸟一样，你才想答话，她就又跳到另一个话题上去了。那样子我觉得十分可爱，她穿得像学生班长一样……那样式我只能说酷了。我明天不去，所以一定见不到她了。明天我就得全情投入到我们的女主人那本书里去了——那本书，相信我，会一路拾遗至臻至宝的、至纯至真的一九一四年。”

220
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Alas, it breaks up tomorrow. Lady Julia departs to celebrate the New Year elsewhere, and takes the beau-monde with her. I shall miss the pretty creatures about the house - particularly one Celia; she is the sister of our old companion in adversity, Boy Mulcaster, and wonderfully unlike, him. She has a bird-like style of conversation, pecking away at the subject in a way I find most engaging, and a school-monitor style of dress which I can only call “saucy”. I shall miss her, for I do not go tomorrow. Tomorrow I start work in earnest on our hostess’s book - which, believe me, is a treasure-house of period gems; pure authentic I9I4.’

221
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茶端上来，喝完没多久，塞巴斯蒂安就回来了。他说他早就从猎狐队里掉了队，所以风风火火地回来了。别人在他回来之后，也在黄昏时被汽车接回来了。里头没有布莱兹赫德，他在狗场有事要办，跟他一起去的还有科迪莉娅。

221
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Tea was brought and, soon after it, Sebastian returned; he had lost the hunt early, he said, and hacked home; the others were not long after him, having been fetched by car at the end of the day; Brideshead was absent; he had business at the kennels and Cordelia had gone with him.

222
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回来的人挤在大厅，很快就吃上了炒鸡蛋和煎饼。而那位在家里吃过午饭在炉火前打了一下午盹的萨姆格拉斯先生，也和他们一起吃着鸡蛋和煎饼。过了一会儿，马奇梅因夫人一行人也回来了，还没等我们上楼换晚餐礼服，她就问大家：“谁要去教堂念《玫瑰经》么？”塞巴斯蒂安和茱丽娅都说他们得马上去洗澡，萨姆格拉斯先生跟她和那位教士一起去了。

222
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The rest filled the hall and were soon eating scrambled eggs and crumpets; and Mr Samgrass, who had lunched at home and dozed all the afternoon before the fire, ate eggs and crumpets with them. Presently Lady Marchmain’s party returned, and when, before we went upstairs to dress for dinner, she said ‘Who’s coming to chapel for the Rosary?’ and Sebastian and Julia said they must have their baths at once, Mr Samgrass went with her and the friar.

223
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“我但愿萨姆格拉斯先生去，”塞巴斯蒂安洗澡的时候说，“对再三向他表示感谢我已经腻味透顶了。”

223
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‘I wish Mr Samgrass would go,’ said Sebastian, in his bath; ‘I’m sick of being grateful to him.’

224
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在接下来的两周里，对萨姆格拉斯先生的厌烦已经在整个大宅里成了一个没有公开的秘密，只要他在场，亚德里安·波森爵士那精良的一双老眼便开始尽力寻找起远方的地平线来，嘴上的戏也足，带着典型的悲观主义表情。只有那两个匈牙利表兄弟，他们误解了这位大学教师的身份，把他当成一个享有特殊权利的高级仆从，并没有因为他在场而受到什么影响。

224
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In the course of the next fortnight distaste for Mr Samgrass came to be a little unspoken secret throughout the house; in his presence Sir Adrian Porson’s fine old eyes seemed to search a distant horizon and his lips set in classic pessimism. Only the Hungarian cousins who, mistaking the status of tutor, took him for an unusually privileged upper servant, were unaffected by his presence.

225
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留下来参加圣诞派对的有萨姆格拉斯先生、亚德里安·波森爵士，以及两个匈牙利人、教士、布莱兹赫德、塞巴斯蒂安和科迪莉娅。

225
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Mr Samgrass, Sir Adrian Porson, the Hungarians, the friar, Brideshead, Sebastian, Cordelia were all who remained of the Christmas party.

226
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在这栋大宅里，宗教一统天下。此一说不仅仅表现在这个家庭的日常起居上——每天早晚都要在小教堂做弥撒和念《玫瑰经》，晨昏定省——而且也表现在人际交往上。“我们要让查尔斯皈依天主教。”马奇梅因夫人说。我在那里做客期间，跟她聊过许多次，每一次她都要把话题巧妙地引到这个神圣的主题上来。第一次谈话过后，塞巴斯蒂安就说：“我妈妈是不是和你絮叨什么了？她一向如此。就让她见鬼去吧。”

226
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Religion predominated in-the house; not only in its practices - the daily mass and Rosary, morning and evening in the chapel - but in all its intercourse. ‘We must make a Catholic of Charles,’ Lady Marchmain said, and we had many little talks together during my visits when she delicately steered the subject into a holy quarter. After the first of these Sebastian said: ‘Has mummy been having one of her “little talks” with you? She’s always doing it. I wish to hell she wouldn’t.’

227
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其实也不是被传唤过去聊聊，或者说有意去聊到这个话题上去。只有当她想跟你亲密恳谈的时候，你才会发现自己和她单独在一起了。如果是在夏天，那他就会发现他们正在安静的水畔散步，或者在四面围墙的玫瑰园的一个角落里聊着，如果是冬天，那就是在一楼她的起居室里了。

227
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One was never summoned for a little talk, or consciously led to it; it merely happened, when she wished to speak intimately, that one found oneself alone with her, if it was summer, in a secluded walk by the lakes or in a corner of the walled rose-gardens; if it was winter, in her sitting-room on the first floor. 

228
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这个起居室是专属于她的。她把这个房间占上之后就将之彻底改头换面。是以一走进这里，你还以为是另一个人家。

228
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This room was all her own; she had taken it for herself and changed it so that, entering, one seemed to be in another house.

229
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她降低了天花板，故而以这样那样的形式为屋子装点的门楣消失不见了；四壁，一面装有织锦的墙，刮干净后给涂上了蓝色的水彩，上面散布着数不清的小小水彩点；房间里的空气甜蜜蜜的，鲜花的清新香气和干花的陈腐香气混杂在一起；她的藏书都是些博大精深的东西，一只紫檀书架上摆满软皮封面的诗集和宗教著作；壁炉架上摆着私人收藏的珍贵的小物件——象牙制的圣母像、圣约瑟的石膏像，还有她三个当兵的弟弟的遗像。

229
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She had lowered the ceiling and the elaborate cornice which, in one form or another, graced every room was lost to view; the walls, one panelled in brocade, were stripped and washed blue and spotted with innumerable little water-colours of fond association; the air was sweet with the fresh scent of flowers and musty potpourri; her library in soft leather covers, well-read works of poetry and piety, filled a small rosewood bookcase; the chimney-piece was covered with small personal treasures - an ivory Madonna, a plaster St Joseph, posthumous miniatures of her three soldier brothers.

230
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我和塞巴斯蒂安两人在那年流光灿烂的八月独自住在布莱兹赫德的时候，对她母亲的这个房间是退避三舍的。

230
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When Sebastian and I lived alone at Brideshead during that brilliant August we had kept out of his mother’s room.?

231
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忆及她这个房间，我也回忆起当时我们谈话的一些片段来。我还记得她说：“我还是小姑娘的时候，我们家说起来还是挺穷的呢，当然比起大多数人家还是富裕得多，到我结婚时就很富有了。我常常很忧虑，想到自己拥有那么多珍宝，可他人却一无所有，我认为这是不对的。现在我明白了，去羡慕穷人才有的特权，富人也可能犯罪。上帝和圣徒总是荣宠穷人，不过我相信，荡涤众生——包括富人的罪孽是上帝的殊宠。罗马帝国不曾有宗教信仰时，有某些东西必然是很残酷的，不可能再是另外的情况了。”

231
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Scraps of conversation come back to me with the memory of her room. I remember her saying: ‘When I was a girl we were comparatively poor, but still richer than most of the world, and when I married I became very rich. It used to worry me, and I thought it wrong to have so many beautiful things when others had nothing. Now I realize that it is possible for the rich to sin by coveting the privileges of the poor. The poor have always been the favourites of God and his saints, but I believe that it is one of the special achievements of Grace to sanctify the whole of life, riches included. Wealth in pagan Rome was necessarily something cruel; it’s not any more.’

232
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我提及了骆驼和针眼的典故[8]，她听到这话就高兴地顺坡往下说到要点了。

[8]《圣经》里的名言，骆驼过针眼比富人进天堂还容易。
232
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I said something about a camel and the eye of a needle and she rose happily to the point.

233
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“当然啰，”她说，“骆驼穿过针眼确实是想也想不到的事情，可是福音书只是种种意想不到的事情的汇编罢了。一头牛和一头驴子在牲口棚里做起礼拜来，这是意想不到的。在圣徒的生活中，牧牲总是会干许多奇奇怪怪的事情。这根本就是宗教诗意的一面，爱丽丝漫游奇境的那一面。”

233
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‘But of course,’ she said, ‘it’s very unexpected for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, but the gospel is simply a catalogue of unexpected things. It’s not to be expected that an ox and an ass should worship at the crib. Animals are always doing the oddest things in the lives of the saints. It’s all part of the poetry, the Alice-in-Wonderland side, of religion.’

234
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但是就像我对她释放的魅力毫无所动一样，对她的信仰我也无动于衷；或者换个说法好了，这两方面对我的触动是一样的。那时的我心心念念的只有塞巴斯蒂安，我看到他受到了威胁，虽然我尚不知这种威胁有多么凶险。他那经常的、绝望的祷告是单独进行的。

234
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But I was as untouched by her faith as I was by her charm: or, rather, I was touched by both alike. I had no mind then for anything except Sebastian, and I saw him already as being threatened, though I did not yet know how black was the threat. His constant, despairing prayer was to be let alone.

235
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因为他的内心有蔚蓝的大海和瑟瑟响的棕榈树，他才像波利尼西亚群岛的土人一样快乐、与世无争；只是当大船在珊瑚礁那边抛锚停泊，小艇冲上环礁湖的时候，商贾、官僚、传教士和旅游者这群凶恶的闯入者踏上了从来未曾沾染过长靴痕迹的净土——这时才发掘出种族的兵刃，山中敲响战鼓；或者退而求其次，离开那阳光照耀的门口，静卧于黑暗之中，在那里，画出来的无用神像仿佛在墙上徒劳地游荡，抱着朗姆酒酒瓶，连心脏都要给咳出来了。

235
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By the blue waters and rustling palms of his own mind he was happy and harmless as a Polynesian; only when the big ship dropped anchor beyond the coral reef, and the cutter beached in the lagoon, and, up the slope that had never known the print of a boot, there trod the grim invasion of trader, administrator, missionary, and tourist - only then was it time to disinter the archaic weapons of the tribe and -sound the drums in the hills; or, more easily, to turn from the sunlit door and lie alone in the darkness, , where the impotent, painted deities paraded the walls in vain and cough his heart out among the rum bottles.?

236
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自从塞巴斯蒂安在这帮入侵者中认识到自己的真心和人类情感的表现以后，他在阿尔卡迪的纯粹安宁的日子也就剩不下几天了。因为这段对我来说平静的日子里，塞巴斯蒂安却惊恐不安。我对他那样的警觉和猜疑的情绪非常明白和熟悉，他就像一只小鹿，一听到远处猎人的声音就突然抬起头来。我看到他念及他的家庭和他的宗教信仰时变得谨小慎微，而现在我发现我也成了他怀疑的对象。

236
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And, since Sebastian counted among the intruders his own conscience and all claims of human affection, his days in Arcadia were numbered. For in this, to me, tranquil time Sebastian took fright. I knew him well in that mood of alertness and suspicion, like a deer suddenly lifting his head at the far notes of the hunt; I had seen him grow wary at the thought of his family or his religion, now I found I, too, was suspect.

237
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他并不是不爱，而是没有了得到爱之后的欢欣，我不再是他寂寞时的伴侣了。随着我和他家人关系的日益密切，我也就日益成为他避之唯恐不及的社会的一部分了，与此同时，我也日益成为他的束缚。而这，也正是他妈妈在和我闲聊的过程中竭力想让我发挥的作用所在。一切尽在不言中。我只是偶尔才会迷迷糊糊地猜度是不是正在搞着什么飞机。

237
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He did not fail in love, but he lost his joy of it, for I was no longer part of his solitude. As my intimacy with his family grew, I became part of the world which he sought to escape; I became one of the bonds which held him. That was the part for which his mother, in all our little talks, was seeking to fit me. Everything was left unsaid. It was only dimly and at rare moments that I suspected what was afoot.

238
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表面上看，萨姆格拉斯先生是唯一的敌人。我和塞巴斯蒂安在布莱兹赫德待了两个星期，过着自己的日子。他哥哥全副心神都投在做运动和地产经营上。萨姆格拉斯先生在图书室里埋头编纂马奇梅因夫人的回忆录；亚德里安·波森爵士则占去了马奇梅因夫人的大部分时间，除了晚上，我们很少能看见他们。偌大的屋檐下，各人有各人的活法。

238
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Outwardly Mr Samgrass was the only enemy. For a fortnight Sebastian and I remained at Brideshead, leading our own life. His brother was engaged in sport and estate management; Mr Samgrass was at work in the library on Lady Marchmain’s book; Sir Adrian Porson demanded most of Lady Marchmain’s time. We saw little of them except in the evenings; there was room under that wide roof for a wide variety of independent lives.

239
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两周过后，塞巴斯蒂安说：“我再也受不了萨姆格拉斯先生了。我们去伦敦吧。”于是他就跟我到了伦敦，从现在开始不住马奇梅因家而在我家出入了。我父亲很喜欢他。“我觉得你的朋友很有意思，”他说，“请他常来吧。”

239
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After a fortnight Sebastian said: ‘I can’t stand Mr Samgrass any more. Let’s go to London,’ so he came to stay with me and now began to use my home in preference to ‘Marchers’. My father liked him. ‘I think your friend very amusing,’ he said. ‘Ask him often.’

240
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后来，我们回到了牛津，重新过起那种仿佛寒冷得要龟缩成一团的日子。塞巴斯蒂安早在上一学期就在心里深切悲伤时被一种无声的怨怼所取代，甚至连我也被他怨上了。他心里难受，可我却搞不懂原委，为他难过，但又爱莫能助。

240
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Then, back at Oxford, we took up again the life that seemed to be shrinking in the cold air. The sadness that had been strong in Sebastian the term before gave place to kind of sullenness, even towards me. He was sick at heart somewhere, I did not know how, and I grieved for him, unable to help.

241
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现在，他能高兴起来的时候通常只是他喝醉了酒的时候，他一喝醉了，就爱“嘲弄萨姆格拉斯先生一下子”。他作了首小曲儿，只有不断重复的一句，“绿屁股，萨姆格拉斯，萨姆格拉斯，绿屁股”，再配上圣玛丽教堂的钟声一起和谐唱响，他还在他窗户底下对他唱起小夜曲，约莫着每周一回吧。

241
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When he was gay now it was usually because he was drunk, and when drunk he developed an obsession of ‘mocking Mr Samgrass’. He composed a ditty of which the refrain was, ‘Green arse, Samgrass - Samgrass green arse’, sung to the tune of St Mary’s chime, and he would thus serenade him, perhaps once a week, under his windows.

242
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萨姆格拉斯先生是以头一位在自己房间里装私人电话而一枝独秀，塞巴斯蒂安喝醉了就常常打电话给他，把这支小曲唱给他听。对这些，萨姆格拉斯先生一点儿不以为忤，毫不见怪，而且像人们认为的那样，他一遇到我们，脸上总是挂着奉承谄媚的笑容，却带着一种与日俱增的信心，好像每一次的侮辱和伤害，都在某种程度上加强了他对塞巴斯蒂安的把控。

242
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Mr Samgrass was distinguished as being the first don to have a private telephone installed in his rooms. Sebastian in his cups used to ring him up and sing him this simple song.? And all this Mr Samgrass took in good part, as it is called, smiling obsequiously when we met, but with growing confidence, as though each outrage in some way strengthened his hold on Sebastian.

243
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这一学期我开始认识到，塞巴斯蒂安喝醉酒跟我喝醉酒完全是两码事。我常喝醉，就是兴奋过度所致，并且贪恋醉酒的时刻，还希望延长和增强醉感。而塞巴斯蒂安却是为了逃开现实。

243
-

It was during this term that I began to realize that Sebastian was a drunkard in quite a different sense to myself I got drunk often, but through an excess of high spirits, in the love of the moment, and the wish to prolong and enhance it; Sebastian drank to escape.

244
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随着我们一天一天成长，一天一天更严肃，我喝得越来越少，而他却喝得越来越多。我发现有时我回到我们学院以后，他还一个人坐到很晚不睡，狂喝不止。他身上那些一连串的祸患，来得迅疾而猛烈，又叫人意料不到，搞得我很难讲究竟是什么时候看出来我的朋友正处在极大的苦闷之中的。复活节假期我才完全弄明白是怎么回事。

244
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As we together grew older and more serious I drank less, he more. I found that sometimes after I had gone back to my college, he sat up late and alone, soaking. A succession of disasters came on him so swiftly and with such unexpected violence that it is hard to say when exactly I recognized that my friend was in deep trouble. I knew it well enough in the Easter vacation.

245
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茱丽娅常常说：“可怜的塞巴斯蒂安，他身上发生化学反应了。”是当时流行的时髦话，鬼知道这是由通俗科学的哪个误解给引申出来的。像“他们之间存在着某种化学反应”这句话，就是用来说明随便哪两个人之间强烈的爱、恨、情、仇的，是用新方式来表达宿命的老观念。我可不相信我的朋友身上会发生什么化学反应。

245
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Julia used to say, ‘Poor Sebastian. It’s something chemical in him.’ That was the cant phrase of the time, derived from heaven knows what misconception of popular science. ‘There’s something chemical between them’ was used to explain the over-mastering hate or love of any two people. It was the old concept in a new form. I do not believe there was anything chemical in my friend. 

246
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布莱兹赫德的复活节派对过得真是痛苦，末了发生的一件虽小却叫人难忘的事情将这痛苦推到了顶点。当时塞巴斯蒂安在他母亲家里，晚饭前就已喝得烂醉，这标志着他的忧郁迈进了一个新纪元，继而发展到逃出家庭，导致了他的毁灭。

246
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The Easter party at Brideshead was a bitter time, culminating in a small but unforgettably painful incident. Sebastian got very drunk before dinner in his mother’s house, and thus marked the beginning of a new epoch in his melancholy record, another stride in the flight from his family which brought him to ruin.?

247
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黄昏时分，很多到布莱兹赫德过复活节假期的人已经离开了。虽说是来度复活节假期，但实际上大家到齐那天已经是复活节那周的星期二了，因为弗莱特一家人从濯足节[9]到复活节一直都在教堂里清修，直到那天才再次露面。塞巴斯蒂安早就说过复活节他不回家，可到了最后一刻他到底让了步，回家时颇为郁闷，我也完全无法让他振作起来。

[9]复活节前一周的星期四，以纪念耶稣为其门徒洗脚。
247
-

It was at the end of the day when the large Easter party left Brideshead. It was called the Easter party, though in fact it began on the Tuesday of Easter Week, for the Flytes all went into retreat at the guest-house of a monastery from Maundy Thursday until Easter. This year Sebastian had said he would not go, but at the last moment had yielded, and came home in a state of acute depression from which I totally failed to raise him.

248
-

他整整一个星期都喝得很厉害——只有我知道有多厉害——他喝得神经紧张，偷偷摸摸，与之前的风格全然不同。在聚会期间，图书馆里总会放着一托盘兑了水的烈酒，塞巴斯蒂安一有空就偷溜进去，甚至跟我都不说。白天家里基本没人，我就在柱廊那间小小的花园房里画另一幅画。

248
-

He had been drinking very hard for a week - only I knew how hard - and drinking in a nervous, surreptitious way, totally unlike his old habit. During the party there was always a grog tray in the library, and Sebastian took to slipping in there at odd moments during the day without saying anything even to me. The house was largely deserted during the day. I was at work painting another panel in the little garden-room in the colonnade.

249
-

塞巴斯蒂安说自己感冒了，要留在房里——这段时间他就没怎么清醒过。他一声不吭地避开别人的注意。我常常注意到他引来了人们好奇的目光，不过来度假的大多数人都不怎么了解他，也就看不出他身上所起的变化，而他家的人又忙得不可开交，每个人都有自己的客人要应酬。

249
-

Sebastian complained of a cold, stayed in, and during all that time was never quite sober; he escaped attention by being silent. Now and then I noticed him attract curious glances, but most of the party knew him too slightly to see the change in him, while his own family were occupied, each with their particular guests.?

250
-

我一劝他他就说：“真受不了这些人。”可待众人终于离开，在逼仄的空间里他不得不面对他家人的时候，他就崩溃了。

250
-

When I remonstrated he said, ‘I can’t stand all these people about,” but it was when they finally left and he had to face his family at close quarters that he broke down.?

251
-

通常来说，六点钟会把鸡尾酒端到客厅来，我们再自己调自己要喝的，等到换礼服时，酒瓶就给拿走了。在餐前鸡尾酒会再来，由男仆递给每个人。

251
-

The normal practice was for a cocktail tray to be brought into the drawing-room at six; we mixed our own drinks and the bottles were removed when we went to dress; later, just before dinner, cocktails appeared again, this time handed round by the footmen.

252
-

那天一用完茶点，塞巴斯蒂安就不见了。天色渐晚，我和科迪莉娅玩了一小时麻将。到了六点，只剩我一个人在客厅，这时塞巴斯蒂安回来了。他皱着眉，我非常熟悉他这个样子，他才一张口说话，我就从声音里听出他的醉醺醺来了。

252
-

Sebastian disappeared after tea; the light had gone and I spent the next hour playing mah-jongg with Cordelia. At six I was alone in the drawing-room, when he returned; he was frowning in a way I knew all too well, and when he spoke I recognized the drunken thickening in his voice.

253
-

“他们还没把鸡尾酒端过来吗？”他手脚笨拙地拽了铃绳。

253
-

‘Haven’t they brought the cocktails yet?’ He pulled clumsily on the bell-rope.

254
-

我说：“你刚才上哪儿了？”

254
-

I said, ‘Where have you been?’

255
-

“楼上，保姆那儿。”

255
-

‘Up with nanny.’

256
-

“我才不信呢。你一直在什么地方躲着喝酒呢。”

256
-

‘I don’t believe it. You’ve been drinking somewhere.’

257
-

“是一直在房里看书。我的感冒今天又加重了。”托盘端进来后，他歪歪斜斜地把杜松子酒和苦艾酒倒进一只大平底玻璃杯，端着走出客厅。我跟着他上了楼，他当着我的面把门碰上，并且明确地上了锁。我垂头丧气地回到客厅，心里充满了不祥的预感。

257
-

‘I’ve been reading in my room. My cold’s worse today.’ When the tray arrived he slopped gin and vermouth into a tumbler and carried it out of the room with him. I followed him upstairs, where he shut his bedroom door in my face and turned the key.  I returned to the drawing-room full of dismay and foreboding.

258
-

这时全家人都坐在一起。马奇梅因夫人说：“塞巴斯蒂安现在怎么样了？”

258
-

The family assembled. Lady Marchmain said: ‘What’s become of Sebastian?’

259
-

“睡下了。他的感冒更严重了。”

259
-

‘He’s gone to lie down. His cold is worse.’

260
-

“哦，亲爱的，希望他别是得了流感。最近一两次我都觉得他像在发烧了。他需要什么吗？”

260
-

‘Oh dear, I hope he isn’t getting flu. I thought he had a feverish look once or twice lately. Is there anything he wants?’

261
-

“不要什么。只是特别要求别打搅他。”

261
-

‘No, he particularly asked not to be disturbed.’

262
-

我吃不准是否应该跟布莱兹赫德说一声，可他那冷酷无情的石头面孔打消了我对他的信任。在去楼上换衣服的时候把这事告诉了茱丽娅。

262
-

I wondered whether I ought to speak to Brideshead, but that grim, rock-crystal mask forbade all confidence. Instead, on the way upstairs to dress, I told Julia. 

263
-

“塞巴斯蒂安喝醉了。”

263
-

‘Sebastian’s drunk.’

264
-

“不会吧。他连鸡尾酒也没下来喝呀。”

264
-

‘He can’t be. He didn’t even come for a cocktail.’

265
-

“他在自己房间里喝了一下午。”

265
-

‘He’s been drinking in. his room all the afternoon.’

266
-

“太离谱了！他怎么这么无聊啊。那到时候还能吃晚饭吗？”

266
-

‘How very peculiar! What a bore he is! Will he be all right for dinner?’

267
-

“不能。”

267
-

‘No.’

268
-

“嗨，你必须得管管他，这不关我的事。他经常这么喝吗？”

268
-

‘Well, you must deal with him. It’s no business of mine. Does he often do this?’

269
-

“最近经常。”

269
-

‘He has lately.’

270
-

“无聊透顶。”

270
-

‘How very boring.’

271
-

我试着敲塞巴斯蒂安的房门，发现门已经锁了，心里希望他睡着了，可是我洗完澡回来，却看见他正坐在壁炉前的椅子上。他已经换好了参加晚宴的礼服，只差穿鞋，领结歪歪着，头发根根直竖。他满脸通红，眼睛眯缝着，口齿含糊不清。

271
-

I tried Sebastian’s door, found it locked, and hoped he was sleeping, but, when I came back from my bath, I found him sitting in the chair before my fire; he was dressed for dinner, all but his shoes, but his tie was awry and his hair on end; he was very red in the face and squinting slightly. He spoke indistinctly.

272
-

“查尔斯，你说得很对。我没在保姆那儿。一直在楼上喝威士忌。聚会散了，图书室也没人了。聚会一散，就只剩妈妈了。我觉得我喝多了。我还是在楼上拿盘子装上点儿吃的果腹好了，不和妈妈一起吃饭了。”

272
-

‘Charles, what you said was quite true. Not with nanny. Been drinking whisky up here. None in the library now party’s gone. Now party’s gone and only mummy. Feeling rather drunk. Think I’d better have something-on-a-tray up here. Not dinner with mummy.’

273
-

“睡觉去吧，”我跟他说，“我就说你的感冒更严重了。”

273
-

‘Go to bed,’ I told him. ‘I’ll say your cold’s worse.’

274
-

“严重多了。”

274
-

‘Much worse.’

275
-

我把他带回他的房间，就在我隔壁，想让他躺到床上去，可他坐在梳妆台前，眯起眼睛看着镜中的自己，整理了一下蝴蝶结。壁炉边的那张写字台上放着瓶半空的威士忌。我把酒瓶拿起来，以为他看不见，可他立刻从镜子前掉转过身来说：“你把它放下。”

275
-

I took him to his room which was next to mine and tried to get him to bed, but he sat in front of his dressing table squinnying at himself in the glass, trying to remake his bow-tie. On the writing table by the fire was a half-empty decanter of whisky. I took it up, thinking he would not see, but he spun round from the mirror and said: ‘You put that down.’

276
-

“别蠢了，塞巴斯蒂安。你喝得已经够多的了。”

276
-

‘Don’t be an ass, Sebastian. You’ve had enough.’

277
-

“这特么活见鬼了跟你有什么关系？你只不过是这儿的客人——我的客人而已。我在自己的地盘，想喝什么就喝什么。”当时他看上去能为此跟我打上一架。

277
-

‘What the devil’s it got to do with you? You’re only a guest here - my guest. I drink what I want to in my own house.’ He would have fought me for it at that moment. 

278
-

“好吧，”我说着，把酒瓶放了回去，“看在上帝的份上，请无视这瓶酒吧。”

278
-

‘Very well,’ I said, putting the decanter back, ‘Only for God’s sake keep out of sight.’

279
-

“你只管操心你自己的事吧。你是作为我的朋友上这儿来的，可现在你替我妈妈在暗地里监视我，我什么都知道。好了，现在你可以滚了，你替我告诉她，以后我选我的朋友，她选她的探子，井水不犯河水。”

279
-

‘Oh, mind your own business. You came here as my friend; now you’re spying on me for my mother, I know. Well, you can get out and tell her from me that I’ll choose my friends and she her spies in future.’

280
-

我走了，到楼下去吃饭。

280
-

So I left him and went down to dinner.

281
-

“刚才我去过塞巴斯蒂安那儿了，他感冒得特别厉害，现在已经睡下了，说什么也不需要。”

281
-

‘I’ve been in to Sebastian,’ I said. ‘His cold has come on rather badly. He’s gone to bed and says he doesn’t want anything.’

282
-

“可怜的塞巴斯蒂安，”马奇梅因夫人说，“他最好喝一杯热威士忌，我要去看看他。”

282
-

‘Poor Sebastian,’ said Lady Marchmain. ‘He’d better have a glass of hot whisky. I’ll go and have a look at him.’

283
-

“别，妈妈，还是我去吧。”茱丽娅说着站起来。

283
-

‘Don’t mummy, I’ll go,’ said Julia rising.

284
-

“我去吧，”科迪莉娅说，当天晚上因为人都走光了，她下楼吃饭以兹庆祝。她就坐在门口，没等谁拦住就已经出门了。茱丽娅和我对视一眼，悲哀地轻轻耸了耸肩。

284
-

‘I’ll go,’ said Cordelia, who was dining down that night, for a treat to celebrate the departure of the guests. She was at the door and through it before anyone could stop her.  Julia caught my eye and gave a tiny, sad shrug.

285
-

过了几分钟科迪莉娅回来了，表情凝重。“嗯，看来他确实什么也不需要。”她说。

285
-

In a few minutes Cordelia was back, looking grave. ‘No, he doesn’t seem to want anything,’ she said.

286
-

“他怎么样了？”

286
-

‘How was he?’

287
-

“噢，这我可不知道。可我觉得他醉得很厉害。”她说。

287
-

‘Well, I don’t know, but I think he’s very drunk’ she said.

288
-

“科迪莉娅。”

288
-

‘Cordelia.’

289
-

突然这孩子咯咯地笑起来。“‘侯爵之子不习惯喝葡萄酒’，”她引用报纸上的话说，“‘模范学生的前程受到威胁’。”

289
-

Suddenly the child began to giggle. ‘”Marquis’s Son Unused to Wine”,’ she quoted.“’Model Student’s Career Threatened”.’

290
-

“查尔斯，这是真的？”马奇梅因夫人说。

290
-

‘Charles, is this true?’ asked Lady Marchmain.

291
-

“是真的。”

291
-

‘Yes.’

292
-

接着宣布开饭，我们都去了餐厅，也就没再说到这个话题。

292
-

Then dinner was announced, and we went to the dining-room where the subject was not mentioned.

293
-

只有我和布莱兹赫德两个人的时候，他说话了：“你是说塞巴斯蒂安喝醉了？”

293
-

When, Brideshead and I were left alone he said: ‘Did you say Sebastian was drunk?’

294
-

“是的。”

294
-

‘Yes.’

295
-

“他这时机挑得可真好，你就不能劝他不喝吗？”

295
-

‘Extraordinary time to choose. Couldn’t you stop him?’

296
-

“劝不住。”

296
-

‘No.’

297
-

“劝不住，”布莱兹赫德说，“我猜也是劝不住。有一回我看见我父亲喝醉了，就是在这间屋子，那时候我还不到十岁。如果有人存着心非要喝醉，那再怎么劝也是劝不住的。你知道我母亲就劝不住我父亲。”

297
-

‘No,’ said Brideshead, ‘I don’t suppose you could. I once saw my father drunk, in this room. I wasn’t more than about ten at the time. You can’t stop people if they want to get drunk. My mother couldn’t stop my father, you know.’

298
-

他是以那种古怪的、不带任何感情色彩的方式讲的话。我回想，对这个家庭我旁观得越多，就越觉得他们特别。“我要请母亲今晚给我们朗读。”

298
-

He spoke in his odd, impersonal way. The more I saw of this family, I reflected, the more singular I found them. ‘I shall ask my mother to read to us tonight.’

299
-

我后来才知道这已是惯例，在家中出现不安情绪时，总是要请马奇梅因夫人在晚上大声朗读的。她的声音很是悦耳，表情也十分生动幽默。这天晚上，她读的是《布朗神父的智慧》中的片段。茱丽娅坐在那儿，旁边长凳上摆满了修指甲的用具，她认真地涂着指甲油；科迪莉娅摩挲着茱丽娅的北京哈巴狗；布莱兹赫德在那儿一个人玩纸牌；我既然百无聊赖地待着，便闲得研究起他们这一美妙奇特的组合来，同时还替那个躲在楼上的朋友悲伤着。

299
-

It was the custom, I learned later, always to ask Lady Marchmain to read aloud on evenings of family tension. She had a beautiful voice and great humour of expression.? That night she read part of The Wisdom of Father Brown. Julia sat with a stool covered with manicure things and carefully revarnished her nails; Cordelia nursed Julia’s Pekinese; Brideshead played patience; I sat unoccupied studying the pretty group they made, and mourning my friend upstairs.

300
-

但是那一晚的可怕，说到这会儿可不算到了头。

300
-

But the horrors of that evening were not yet over.

301
-

在只有家人的时候，马奇梅因夫人会习惯于在睡觉前去一趟小教堂。她刚合上书，提议说去小教堂，这时候房门开了，塞巴斯蒂安出现了。他依然穿着我刚才看到他时穿的那身，只不过此时脸不红了，正相反，惨白惨白的。

301
-

It was sometimes Lady Marchmain’s practice, when the family were alone, to visit the chapel before going to bed. She had just closed her book and proposed going there when the door opened and Sebastian appeared. He was dressed as I had last seen him, but now instead of being flushed he was deathly pale.

302
-

“我是来道歉的。”他说。

302
-

‘Come to apologize,’ he said.

303
-

“塞巴斯蒂安，亲爱的，快回你自己的房间啊。”马奇梅因夫人说，“明天早上我们再谈这事好吗？”

303
-

‘Sebastian, dear, do go back to your room,’ said Lady Marchmain. ‘We can talk about it in the morning.’

304
-

“不是跟你道歉。我是来跟查尔斯道歉的。我太可恶了，他是我的客人……他是我的客人，也是我唯一的朋友，我却这么可恶。”

304
-

‘Not to you. Come to apologize to Charles. I was bloody to him and he’s my guest.He’s my guest and my only friend and I was bloody to him.’

305
-

一阵寒意席卷了我们。我带他回房，一家人都去祷告了。到了楼上，我注意到那个细颈酒瓶已经全空了。“是时候睡了。”我说。

305
-

A chill spread over us. I led him back to his room; his family went to their prayers. I noticed when we got upstairs that the decanter was now empty. ‘It’s time you were in bed,’ I said.

306
-

塞巴斯蒂安开始哭起来。“你为什么要站在他们那边来跟我作对？我就知道，让你认识他们了，你就会反对我。你为什么要监视我？”

306
-

Sebastian began to weep. ‘Why do you take their side against me? I knew you would if I let you meet them. Why do you spy on me?’

307
-

他说的话超出了我记忆的负荷，即使到现在已经用了二十年去记，也是超出了。终于让他睡了，我自己也很悲伤地去睡了。

307
-

He said more than 1 can bear to remember, even at twenty years’ distance. At last I got him to sleep and very sadly went to bed myself.

308
-

翌日清晨，一大早他就到我房间来了，那时候一家人都还在睡。他拉开窗帘的声音把我吵醒了，我看到他站在那儿，穿戴整齐，吸着烟，背对着我，正看着窗外破晓的长长光影投射到朝露上，早起的小鸟在才抽嫩芽的树枝上鸣叫。我才开口说话，他就转过脸来，脸上没有了头天晚上酒精蹂躏过的残迹，现在的他娇艳欲滴，却又阴沉，一张失望的孩童的脸。

308
-

Next morning, he came to my room very early, while the house still slept; he drew the curtains and the sound of it woke me, to find him there fully dressed, smoking, with his back to me, looking out of the windows to where the long dawn-shadows lay across the dew and the first birds were chattering in the budding tree-tops. When I spoke he turned a face which showed no ravages of the evening before, but was fresh and sullen as a disappointed child’s.

309
-

“喂，”我说，“感觉怎么样？”

309
-

.’Well,’ I said. ‘How do you feel?’

310
-

“有点异怪。可能还是有点醉。我刚才下楼去马厩那儿，想搞一部车子，可是所有东西都给锁着。我们离开这儿吧。”

310
-

‘Rather odd. I think perhaps I’m still a little drunk. I’ve just been down to the stables trying to get a car but everything was locked. We’re off.’

311
-

他拿起我枕边的水瓶喝了几口水，把烟头扔出窗外，接着又点了一支，手颤抖得像个老头子。

311
-

He drank from the water-bottle by my pillow, threw his cigarette from the window, and lit another with hands which trembled like an old man’s.?

312
-

“你要去哪儿？”

312
-

‘Where are you going?’

313
-

“不知道。伦敦吧。我能住你家吗？”

313
-

‘I don’t know. London, I suppose. Can I come and stay with you?’

314
-

“当然可以。”

314
-

‘Of course.’

315
-

“那好，穿衣服。叫他们把我们的行李火车托运过去。”

315
-

‘Well, get dressed. They can send our luggage on by train.’

316
-

“不能这么说走就走吧。”

316
-

‘We can’t just go like this.’

317
-

“我们不能再住下去了。”

317
-

‘We can’t stay.’

318
-

他坐在窗前的椅子上，眼光从我身上移到窗外。过了一会儿，他说：“有些烟囱在冒烟了。他们大概已经打开马厩门了。走吧。”

318
-

He sat on the window seat looking away from me, out of the window. Presently he said: ‘There’s smoke coming from some of the chimneys. They must have opened the stables now. Come on.’

319
-

“我不能走，”我说，“我得跟你母亲道了别再走。”

319
-

I can’t go,’ I said. ‘I must say good-bye to your mother.’

320
-

“真是可爱的小哈巴狗。”

320
-

‘Sweet bulldog.’

321
-

“嘿，我不想不打招呼偷偷溜走。”

321
-

‘Well, I don’t happen to like running away.’

322
-

“顾不了那么多了，我要偷偷溜走，越远越好，越快越好。你和我妈妈想搞什么阴谋诡计就悉听尊便吧。我不会再回来了。”

322
-

‘And I couldn’t care less. And I shall go on running away, as far and as fast as I can.You can hatch up any plot you like with my mother; I shan’t come back.’

323
-

“昨天晚上你就说过这话。”

323
-

‘That’s how you talked last night.’

324
-

“我知道。对不起，查尔斯。我说过我还醉着呢。如果这么说能让你好过一点儿的话，我就说我真恨透了我自己了。”

324
-

‘I know. I’m sorry, Charles. I told you I was still drunk. If it’s any comfort to you, I absolutely detest myself.’

325
-

“这话一点儿也不叫我好过。”

325
-

‘It’s no comfort at all.’

326
-

“总会有点儿好过吧，我原先就是这么想的。好啦，如果你不来的话，就替我跟保姆问好。”

326
-

‘It must be a little, I should have thought. Well, if you won’t come, give my love to nanny.’

327
-

“你真的要走？”

327
-

‘You’re really going?’

328
-

“再真不过。”

328
-

‘Of course.’

329
-

“在伦敦见你行吗？”

329
-

‘Shall I see you in London?’

330
-

“会的，我要去跟你一起住。”

330
-

‘Yes, I’m coming to stay with you.’

331
-

他离开了，可我再没能睡着。约莫过了两个小时，一个男仆端来茶、面包和黄油，还把我新一天要穿的衣物摆出来。

331
-

He left me but I did not sleep again; nearly two hours later a footman came with tea and bread and butter and set my clothes out for a new day.

332
-

上午晚些时我去找了马奇梅因夫人。风有些大了，我们留在室内。我挨着她坐在她房里的壁炉前，她埋头做着针线，正发芽的常春藤在窗棂上格格作响。

332
-

Later that morning I sought Lady Marchmain; the wind had freshened and we stayed indoors; I sat near her before the fire in her room, while she bent over her needlework and the budding creeper rattled on the window panes.

333
-

“我要是没看到他就好了，”她说，“多残忍啊。他喝醉这事我倒不介意——哪个男人年轻的时候没有过这样的事哪。我都习惯了。我的兄弟们在他这个年纪喝起酒来也一样地野。昨天晚上让我痛心的是他整个人就没个高兴头。”

333
-

‘I wish I had not seen him, she said. ‘That was cruel. I do not mind the idea of his being drunk. It is a thing all men do when they are young. I am used to the idea of it.  My brothers were wild at. his age. What hurt last night was that there was nothing happy about him.’

334
-

“我明白，”我说，“我也没有看见他喝成这样过。”

334
-

‘I know,’ I said. ‘I’ve never seen him like that before.’

335
-

“昨天晚上，这么些晚上……客人都走了，就剩我们一家人了——你知道，查尔斯，我向来把你当作自己人的。塞巴斯蒂安很爱你——在你面前他不用费什么劲就很快乐……可他并不快乐。昨天晚上我睡不着，一直想着这件事，他真的，太不快乐了。”

335
-

And last night of all nights...when everyone had gone and there were only ourselves here - you see, Charles, I look on you very much as one of ourselves. Sebastian loves you - when there was no need for him to make an effort to be gay. And he wasn’t gay. I slept very little last night, and all the time I kept coming back to that one thing; he was so unhappy.’

336
-

于我而言，我对自己还半懵半懂的事情，是不可能去跟她解释的，我当时甚至还想“她用不了多久就会明白这个的……说不准她现在就已经明白了”。

336
-

It was impossible for me to explain to her what I only half understood myself; even then I felt, ‘She will learn it soon enough. Perhaps she knows it now.’

337
-

“这是很可怕，”我说，“但也不要认为他常常这样。”

337
-

‘It was horrible,’ I said. ‘But please don’t think that’s his usual way.’

338
-

“萨姆格拉斯先生跟我说过，上学期他一直酗酒。”

338
-

‘Mr Samgrass told me he was drinking too much all last term.’

339
-

“是喝得很厉害，但没像这样过——以前从来没有喝成这个样子过。”

339
-

‘Yes, but not like that - never before.’

340
-

“那么，为什么现在这个样子了？一回家里就这样？和我们在一起就这样？一整夜我都在想啊，祈祷，不知道应该怎么跟他说才好。现在好了，今天早上，他干脆不在了。他多让人伤心啊，一声招呼也不打说走就走。我不想他感到羞愧难堪——他做下的错事才叫人羞愧难堪。”

340
-

’Then why now? here? with us? All night I have been thinking and praying and wondering what I was to say to him, and now, this morning, he isn’t here at all. That was cruel of him, leaving without a word. I don’t want him to be ashamed - it’s being ashamed that makes it all so wrong of him.’

341
-

“他为自己的不快乐而羞愧难堪。”我说。

341
-

’He’s ashamed of being unhappy,’ I said.

342
-

“萨姆格拉斯先生说他吵闹不休，亢奋得不得了。我相信，”她说道，阴沉沉的脸上闪现出一丝俏皮的光，“我知道你和他拿萨姆格拉斯先生寻开心。你们太淘气了。我很喜欢萨姆格拉斯先生，毕竟他也为你们做了许多事，你们也该喜欢他。不过我想，要是我处在你们这个年龄，也是个男孩子的话，也许我自己也想耍耍萨姆格拉斯先生——不，我觉得这些事无伤大雅——可是昨晚和今天早晨的事情却完全是两码事。你知道，这种事以前也发生过。”

342
-

’Mr Samgrass says he is noisy and high-spirited. I believe,’ she said, with a faint light of humour streaking the clouds, ’I believe you and he tease Mr Samgrass rather. It’s naughty of you.I’m very fond of Mr Samgrass, and you should be too, after all he’s done for you. But I think perhaps if I were your age and a man I might be just a little inclined to tease Mr Samgrass myself.No, I don’t mind that, but last night and this morning are something quite different. You see, it’s all happened before.’

343
-

“我只能说我经常看见他喝醉酒，我也经常和他一起喝醉，但是昨天晚上那样子我完全没有见过。”

343
-

’I can only say I’ve seen him drunk often and I’ve been drunk with him often, but last night was quite new to me.’

344
-

“哦，我不是说塞巴斯蒂安。是好多年以前的事了。我曾经与一位我爱过的人经历过这样的事情。嗯，你想必知道我说的是谁吧？就是他父亲。他过去常常喝成那样。有人跟我说他现在不这样了。上帝保佑这是真的。如果是真的，我全心全意感谢上帝。话说回来了，这个离家出走——他也是偷偷溜掉的，你知道。诚如你刚才所言，他为自己的不快乐羞愧难当。他们两个都不快乐，都羞愧难当，结果都偷偷溜掉了。这太可悲了。和我一起长大的兄弟们——”她的大眼睛从绣花上转到壁炉架上那个皮面折叠相框里的三帧照片上——“就不这样。我就是不明白这是怎么回事。你明白吗？查尔斯。”

344
-

’Oh, I don’t mean with Sebastian. I mean years ago. I’ve been through it all before with someone else whom I loved. Well, you must know what I mean - with his father. He used to be drunk in just that way. Someone told me he is not like that now. I pray God it’s true and thank God for it with all my heart, if it is. But the running away - he ran away, too, you know. It was as you said just now, he was ashamed of being unhappy. Both of them unhappy, ashamed, and running away. It’s too pitiful. The men I grew up with’ - and her great eyes moved from the embroidery to the three miniatures in the folding leathecase on the chimney-piece - ’were not like that. I simply don’t understand it. Do you, Charles?’

345
-

“明白一点儿。”

345
-

’Only very little.’

346
-

“然而塞巴斯蒂安爱你胜过爱我们任何一个人。你知道。你得帮帮他。我无能为力了。”

346
-

’And yet Sebastian is fonder of you than of any of us, you know. You’ve got to help him. I can’t.’

347
-

在这里我已经把本来需要很多话来描述的事情压缩成了很少几句。马奇梅因夫人说话其实并不啰唆，但是她以一种女性化的方式来谈论自己的这一话题，调情一般地先是兜着圈子迂回，慢慢靠近，随后又躲开，欲说还休，欲休还说那样子声东击西，就像一只在这话题上轻舞的蝴蝶；迈着“奶奶步”，趁别人转过身背对的时候，神不知鬼不觉地接近她要的七寸，你一转过头来看她，她就磐石般原地不动。“不快乐”“偷偷溜走”——这两点构成了她的伤悲，她用她独特的方式还没说完话便已经将自己的悲伤展露无遗了。她用了一个小时才把她真正想说的话给说出来。后来，等我起身离开时，她像是又想起了什么似的说：“不知道你看过关于我弟弟的书没有？刚刚出版。”

347
-

I have here compressed into a few sentences what, there, required many. Lady Marchmain was not diffuse, but she took hold of her subject in a feminine, flirtatious way, circling, approaching, retreating, feinting; she hovered over it like a butterfly; she played ’grandmother’s steps’ with it, getting nearer the real point imperceptibly while one’s back was turned, standing rooted when she was observed. The unhappiness, the running away - these made up her sorrow,and in her own way she exposed the whole of it, before she was done. It was an hour before she had said all she meant to say. Then, as I rose to leave her, she added as though in an afterthought:’I wonder have you seen my brothers’ book? It has just come out.’

348
-

我告诉她我在塞巴斯蒂安的房间里翻看过。

348
-

I told her I had looked through it in Sebastian’s room.

349
-

“我希望你也有一本。我能送给你一本吗？三个顶天立地的男人。内德是其中最棒的，是最后过世的一个。我早料到会来电报，而电报果真就来了。我想‘现在轮到我儿子去完成内德未竟的事业了’。当时就我一个人。他刚刚去伊顿。你看了关于内德的书就会明白的。”

349
-

’I should like you to have a copy. May I give you one? They were three splendid men; Ned was the best of them. He was the last to be killed, and when the telegram came, as I knew it would come, I thought: ”Now it’s my son’s turn to do what Ned can never do now.” I was alone then. He was just going to Eton. If you read Ned’s book you’ll understand.’

350
-

她书桌上就摆着一本。这时我就想到，“好像我还没进这间屋子，她就计划好要这样子告别了。莫非连这次谈话她也排演过？设若事情不是照现在这个样子发展，她会把书放回抽屉里么？”

350
-

She had a copy lying ready on her bureau. I thought at the time, ’She planned this parting before ever I came in. Had she rehearsed all the interview? If things had gone differently would she have put the book back in the drawer?’

351
-

她在扉页上写下她的名字、我的名字、日期和地点。

351
-

She wrote her name and mine on the fly leaf, the date and place.

352
-

“昨天夜里，我也为你祈祷来着。”她说。

352
-

’I prayed for you, too, in the night,’ she said.

353
-

我走出去，将身后的门关上，将品质低劣的宗教艺术品、沉降到低处的天花板、印花棉布、羊皮面书籍、佛罗伦萨风景画、盛着风信子和干花瓣的大碗、纳纱绣品、亲昵私密的女性气息以及风雅摩登的上流社会通通关在脑后。我回到了镶嵌装饰的穹顶下，回到中央大厅的圆立柱和柱顶下，回到，更好年华、充满阳刚之气的八月里。

353
-

I closed the door behind me, shutting out the bondieuserie, the low ceiling, the chintz, the lambskin bindings, the views of Florence, the bowls of hyacinth and potpourri, the petit-point, the intimate feminine, modern world, and was back under the coved and coffered roof, the columns and entablature of the central hall, in the august, masculine atmosphere of a better age.

354
-

我不是傻瓜，我年纪已经够大了，大到满可以识别出有人变着法儿唆使我做这做那的企图；我年纪又很小，小到可以体会出这样的经验令人愉悦。

354
-

I was no fool; I was old enough to know that an attempt had been made to suborn me and young enough to have found the experience agreeable.

355
-

那天早晨我没看见茱丽娅，正要离开时，科迪莉娅跑到车门前说：“你会见到塞巴斯蒂安吗？请你替我跟他说我对他特别的爱。记得住吗——特别的爱？”

355
-

I did not see Julia that morning, but just as I was leaving Cordelia ran to the door of the car and said: ’Will you be seeing Sebastian? Please give him my special love. Will you remember - my special love?’

356
-

在去伦敦的火车上，我读了马奇梅因夫人送我的那本书。卷首的插图是一帧身穿掷弹兵军服的年轻人的照片。从照片上可以清晰看出那种戴着冷酷无情的假面的源远流长，就像布莱兹赫德脸上的一样，假面遮盖了他们家族的荣光。照片上的年轻人出没在森林或岩洞，是一个猎人，一个部落的法官，是一个同周围环境做斗争的战斗民族一万种传统的严格力行者。书里还有一些其他插图，几张三兄弟的度假照片，每一张都可以追溯到同样的亘古本质。再想起马奇梅因夫人，她那么艳光四射、处事精巧，真心找不出她与这些阴沉脸的男人有什么相似之处来。

356
-

In the train to London I read the book Lady Marchmain had given me. The frontispiece reproduced the photograph of a young man in Grenadier uniform, and I saw plainly revealed there the origin of that grim mask which, in Brideshead, overlaid the gracious features of his father’s family; this was a man of the woods and caves, a hunter, a judge of the tribal council, the repository of the harsh traditions of a people at war with their environment. There were other illustrations in the book, snapshots of the three brothers on holiday, and in each I traced the same archaic lines; and remembering Lady Marchmain, starry and delicate, I could find no likeness to her in these sombre men.

357
-

她在这本书中出现的次数不多。她比他们中最大的还要年长九岁，她结婚离开家的时候，他们还是小学生。在她和他们之间还有两个妹妹；在生下第三个女孩之后，她父母各种朝拜，各种虔诚，祈求能够诞下男丁，由于他们家家底甚为殷实，并且还是古老的名门望族。男性继承人到很晚才来，接连生了好几个儿子的时候，总算能传宗接代延续香火了，可是又发生了这么悲催的事情，三位男性相继身亡，这个家族的香火又猝然断掉了。

357
-

She appeared seldom in the book; she was older than the eldest of them by nine years and had married and left home while they were schoolboys; between her and them stood two other sisters;after the birth of the third daughter there had been pilgrimages and pious benedictions in request for a son, for theirs was a wide property and an ancient name; male heirs had come late and, when they came, in a profusion which at the time seemed to promise continuity to the line which, in the tragic event, ended abruptly with them.

358
-

这是一部典型的信奉天主教的英格兰乡绅家族史。从伊丽莎白女王统治时期一直到维多利亚女王当政，他们只和他们的佃户及族人在一起，一直过着离群索居的生活，把儿子送出国读书，通常在当地成婚，不是族内成亲，就是跟一帮和他们门第相当的世家联姻，被剥夺了特权，那迷惘的几代人还要受一些教训——这些教训可以在家族最后三个男丁的一生中辨认出来。

358
-

The family history was typical of the Catholic squires of England; from Elizabeth’s reign till Victoria’s they lived sequestered lives, among their tenantry and kinsmen, sending their sons to school abroad, often marrying there, inter-marrying, if not, with a score of families like themselves, debarred from all preferment, and learning, in those lost generations, lessons which could still be read in the lives of the last three men of the house.

359
-

萨姆格拉斯先生巧妙娴熟地把各种文体文字汇编一处，却编排得浑然一体，十分了得——诗歌、信件、日记摘抄、未发表过的文章……这些文字都爆发出一模一样的昂扬严肃、孔武有力，极富精神境界的灵气。此外还收录了他们三位死后同时代人写的几封来信，虽然表达的文字水平关联程度各有千秋，不过讲述的却全都是死者如出一辙的故事，说死者生前文韬武略，声名卓著，似锦前程就在眼前了。看得出这三兄弟与他们的朋友们不知怎的有些疏离，他们视死如归，献出了自己的生命，最后只能让人敬献花环悼念缅怀。

359
-

Mr Samgrass’s deft editorship had assembled and arranged a curiously homogeneous little body of writing - poetry, letters, scraps of a journal, an unpublished essay or two, which all exhaled the same high-spirited, serious, chivalrous, otherworldly air and the letters from their contemporaries, written after their deaths, all in varying degrees of articulateness, told the same tale of men who were, in all the full flood of academic and athletic success, of popularity and the promise of great rewards ahead, seen somehow as set apart from their fellows, garlanded victims,devoted to the sacrifice.

360
-

这些人非得死不可，这样才可以为胡珀创造一个新世界。他们是土著，是法治之下的害群之马，稀松平常地被收拾掉，从而确保那些戴着夹鼻眼镜、摆着汗湿的大胖手、一咧开嘴笑就露出满口假牙的旅行商人平安。火车驶出越来越远，我离马奇梅因夫人也越来越远了，我忍不住猜想，她身上有没有同样的烙印，之于战争之外的方式使得她和她的家人归于毁灭？在她舒适的壁炉通红的烈焰中心，玻璃窗上爬墙虎的格格声中，没有听闻幻灭的轻唱。

360
-

These men must die to make a world for Hooper; they were the aborigines,vermin by right of law, to be shot off at leisure so that things might be safe for the travelling salesman, with his polygonal pince-nez, his fat wet hand-shake, his grinning dentures. I wondered,as the train carried me farther and farther from Lady Marchmain, whether perhaps there was not on her, too, the same blaze, marking her and hers for destruction by other ways than war. Did she see a sign in the red centre of her cosy grate and hear it in the rattle of creeper on the window-pane,this whisper of doom?

361
-

车到帕丁顿站我回到家里，看见塞巴斯蒂安已经在了，还看见那种愁云惨雾业已烟消云散，他轻松又活泼，就像我当年初初与他相遇的样子。

361
-

Then I reached Paddington and, returning home, found Sebastian there, and the sense of tragedy vanished, for he was gay and free as when I first met him.

362
-

“科迪莉娅要我转达她对你的特别的爱。”

362
-

’Cordelia sent you her special love.’

363
-

“你和我妈妈‘聊了’吗？”

363
-

’Did you have a ”little talk” with mummy?’

364
-

“嗯，聊了。”

364
-

’Yes.’

365
-

“你转到她那边去了？”

365
-

’Have you gone over to her side?

366
-

要是头一天我就会说：“并没有对立的这边那边么。”可这时我说：“不，我站在你这边，‘不理世俗的塞巴斯蒂安’。”

366
-

The day before I would have said: ’There aren’t two sides’; that day I said, ’No, I’m with you,”Sebastian contra mundum”.’

367
-

我们就这个问题只说了寥寥数语，此后就再没谈起过这个话题。

367
-

And that was all the conversation we had on the subject, then or ever.

368
-

可是阴霾已经渐渐笼罩了塞巴斯蒂安。我们回到牛津，窗下的紫罗兰再次绽放，栗子树映亮了街道，鹅卵石路铺满了温暖的碎石子，可今时再也不同往日，塞巴斯蒂安的心已是隆冬。

368
-

But the shadows were closing round Sebastian. We returned to Oxford and once again the gillyflowers bloomed under my windows and the chestnut lit the streets and the warm stones strewed their flakes upon the cobble; but it was not as it had been; there was mid-winter in Sebastian’s heart.

369
-

几个星期过去了。我们为即将到来的新学期找寄宿的地方，结果在默顿大街找到了一处僻静又昂贵的小房子，离网球场很近。

369
-

The weeks went by; we looked for lodgings for the coming term and found them in Merton Street, a secluded, expensive little house near the tennis court.

370
-

我遇到近来不常见到的萨姆格拉斯先生，就把我们找房子的事情跟他说了说。他正站在布莱克韦尔书店的桌子旁，那时正展览一些最新出版的德文书，他把买来的书堆放在一边。

370
-

Meeting Mr Samgrass, whom we had seen less often of late, I told him of our choice. He was standing at the table in Blackwell’s where recent German books were displayed, setting aside a little heap of purchases.

371
-

“你和塞巴斯蒂安合住吗？”他说，“这么说他下个学期还要读啊？”

371
-

’You’re sharing digs with Sebastian?’ he said. ’So he is coming up next term?’

372
-

“我想是这样的。他为什么不读呢？”

372
-

’I suppose so. Why shouldn’t he be?’

373
-

“我可不知道原因。我怎么老觉得也许他要不上大学了。但是在这种事情上我总是猜不对……我倒很喜欢默顿街。”

373
-

’I don’t know why; I somehow thought perhaps he wasn’t. I’m always wrong about things like that. I like Merton Street.’

374
-

他给我看他买的书，我又不懂德文，所以对这些书毫无兴趣。我要离开的时候，他说：“可别以为我多管闲事，你知道，你们真确定住了，我才会在默顿大街做出明确安排。”

374
-

He showed me the books he was buying, which, since I knew no German, were not of interest to me. As I left him he said: ’Don’t think me interfering, you know, but I shouldn’t make any definite arrangement in Merton Street until you’re sure.’

375
-

我把这事告诉了塞巴斯蒂安，他说：“那可不，搞阴谋诡计啊。我妈想让我住到贝尔主教那儿去。”

375
-

I told Sebastian of this conversation and he said: ’Yes, there’s a plot on. Mummy wants me to go and live with Mgr Bell.’

376
-

“你怎么不告诉我？”

376
-

’Why didn’t you tell me about it?’

377
-

“因为我不打算和贝尔主教一块儿住。”

377
-

’Because I’m not going to live with Mgr Bell.’

378
-

“我还是觉得你应该告诉我……这是什么时候的事？”

378
-

’I still think you might have told me. When did it start?’

379
-

“一直，你知道，我妈精明得很。她看出在你这儿不成功没指望了。我估计就是你看完内德舅舅那本书之后给她写的那封信起了作用。”

379
-

’Oh, it’s been going on. Mummy’s very clever, you know. She saw she’d failed with you. I expect it was the letter you wrote after reading Uncle Ned’s book.’

380
-

“我几乎什么也没说。”

380
-

’I hardly said anything.’

381
-

“就是因为什么也没说。倘若你以后对她有用的话，你就会说好多好多了。内德舅舅就是拿来试探你的。”

381
-

’That was it. If you were going to be any help to her, you would have said a lot. Uncle Ned is the test, you know.’

382
-

不过看起来她尚未全盘绝望，几天之后我收到她的一个便条，上面写着：“我星期二会经停牛津，希望见到你和塞巴斯蒂安。我想先跟你单独聊五分钟，然后再去见他。此一要求不会太过分吧？我将在十二点钟左右去你的寓所。”

382
-

But it seemed she had not quite despaired, for a few days later I got a note from her which said: ’I shall be passing through Oxford on Tuesday and hope to see you and Sebastian. I would like to see you alone for five minutes before I see him. Is that too much to ask? I will come to your rooms at about twelve.’

383
-

她来了，大加赞赏了我住的地方……“你知道，我弟弟西蒙和内德也在这儿读过书。内德的房子正对着花园。我原本希望塞巴斯蒂安也来这儿的，可是我丈夫当时在基督教会学院任职，如你所知，塞巴斯蒂安的教育是由他负责的。”她又赞赏起我的画来……“大家都很喜欢你在花园小屋里画的那些画儿。要是你不把那些画都画完的话，我们可不答应。”最后，她终于说到主题了。

383
-

She came; she admired my rooms... ’My brothers Simon and Ned were here, you know. Ned had rooms on the garden front. I wanted Sebastian to come here, too, but my husband was at Christ Church and, as you know, he took charge of Sebastian’s education’; she admired my drawings...’everyone loves your paintings in the garden-room. We shall never forgive you if you don’t finish them.’ Finally, she came to her point.

384
-

“我想你已经猜到我来这儿要问什么了。很简单，这个学期塞巴斯蒂安喝酒喝得还厉害吗？”

384
-

’I expect you’ve guessed already what I have come to ask. Quite simply, is Sebastian drinking too much this term?’

385
-

我猜到她要问这个，回答说：“如果他喝得很厉害，我就不会回答你。事实上，我得说不厉害。”

385
-

I had guessed; I answered: ’If he were, I shouldn’t answer. As it is I can say, ”No”.’

386
-

她说：“我相信你，感谢上帝！”随后我们就一块去基督教会学院吃了午饭。

386
-

She said: ’I believe you. Thank God!’ and we went together to luncheon at Christ Church.

387
-

那天晚上塞巴斯蒂安又遭了第三次灾。一点钟，被低年级生院长逮到他在汤姆学院的四方院子里乱晃，已是醉得不可救药让人绝望。

387
-

That night Sebastian had his third disaster and was found by the junior dean at one o’clock, wandering round Tom Quad hopelessly drunk.

388
-

我是在差几分钟十二点离开他的，当时虽然他闷闷不乐，但还是很清醒的。可随后他就灌了半瓶威士忌。第二天早晨他来告诉我，他喝断了片儿，对这事根本记不清了。

388
-

I had left him morose but completely sober at a few minutes before twelve. In the succeeding hour he had drunk half a bottle of whisky alone. He did not remember much about it when he came to tell me next morning.

389
-

“你是不是常常这么干？”我问，“我一走你就一个人喝？”

389
-

’Have you been doing that a lot,’ I asked, ’drinking by yourself after I’ve gone?’

390
-

“大概有两次吧……要不然就是四次。他们烦我我才喝的。他们不管我就没事了。”

390
-

’About twice; perhaps four times. It’s only when they start bothering me. I’d be all right if they’d only leave me alone.’

391
-

“他们现在不会烦你了。”我说。

391
-

’They won’t now,’ I said.

392
-

“我知道。”

392
-

’I know.’

393
-

我们两人都知道快要大难临头了。我那天上午对塞巴斯蒂安也爱不起来，他需要，可是我没有可给他的。

393
-

We both knew that this was a crisis. I had no love for Sebastian that morning; he needed it,but I had none to give.

394
-

“说真的，”我说，“如果你每次看到你家里的一个人，你都要自己喝一顿大酒的话，那你可就彻底没指望了。”

394
-

’Really,’ I said, ’if you are going to embark on a solitary bout of drinking every time you see a member of your family, it’s perfectly hopeless.’

395
-

“嗯，是呀，”塞巴斯蒂安伤心道，“我知道。是没指望了。”

395
-

’Oh, yes,’ said Sebastian with great sadness. ’I know. It’s hopeless.’

396
-

这样一来我的自尊又受到了伤害，这使我看来既像个骗人精，却又无法满足他的需要。

396
-

But my pride was stung because I had been made to look a liar and I could not respond to his need.

397
-

“喂，你打算怎么办？”

397
-

’Well, what do you propose to do?’

398
-

“我什么也不做。他们会把事情做尽的。”

398
-

’I shan’t do anything. They’ll do it all.’

399
-

我没安慰他就让他走了。

399
-

And I let him go without comfort.

400
-

然后机器又开始重新运转，与十二月一模一样的情况又从头再来一遍。萨姆格拉斯先生和贝尔主教去见了基督教会学院院长，布莱兹赫德来这里住了一夜。小齿轮的飞转带着大齿轮转。大家都为马奇梅因夫人感到遗憾，她几个弟弟的名字金漆描字记载在阵亡将士名录上，关于她几个弟弟的事迹，人们记忆犹新。

400
-

Then the machinery began to move again, and I saw it all repeated as it had happened in December; Mr Samgrass and Mgr Bell saw the Dean of Christ Church; Brideshead came up for a night; the heavy wheels stirred and the small wheels spun. Everyone was exceedingly sorry for Lady Marchmain, whose brothers’ names stood in letters of gold on the war memorial, whose brothers’ memory was fresh in many breasts.

401
-

她又来看我了，我又不得不把一大堆话简化为几句。长谈伴着我们从霍利维尔到公园，穿过美索不达米亚大街、北牛津渡口——这天晚上她要在北牛津跟一屋子修女一起过，修女们都在她的某种荫庇之下。

401
-

She came to see me and, again, I must reduce to a few words a conversation which took us from Holywell to the Parks, through Mesopotamia, and over the ferry to north Oxford, where she was staying the night with a houseful of nuns who were in some way under her protection.

402
-

“你必须得相信，”我说，“我跟你说塞巴斯蒂安不喝酒时，说的是我所见所闻知道的实情。”

402
-

’You must believe,’ I said, ’that when I told you Sebastian was not drinking, I was telling you the truth, as I knew it.’

403
-

“我明白你想做他的好朋友。”

403
-

’I know you wish to be a good friend to him.’

404
-

“我不是这个意思。我相信我说过的那些话——现在在某种程度上我还是相信。我相信他以前喝醉过两三次，不会再多了。”

404
-

’That is not what I mean. I believed what I told you. I still believe it to some extent. I believe he has been drunk two or three times before, not more.’

405
-

“这样可不好，查尔斯，”她说，“你所有的话无非是要表明你对他的影响和对他的了解，其实并不像我想的大和多。我们两个谁相信他都没有好处。我以前就了解酒鬼。他们最可怕的一件事就是欺骗。最先扔下的，就是诚挚之爱。

405
-

’It’s no good, Charles,’ she said. ’All you can mean is that you have not as much influence or knowledge of him as I thought. It is no good either of us trying to believe him. I’ve known drunkards before. One of the most terrible things about them is their deceit. Love of truth is the first thing that goes.

406
-

“那顿愉快的午餐之后，你一走，他对着我乖巧得就像他还是小孩子的时候那样，我满足了他的一切要求。你知道，我对他和你一起同居心下存疑，还是不大放心的。我知道你能理解我这话的意思。你知道，撇开你是塞巴斯蒂安的朋友这一点之外，我们还是都很喜欢你。要是你不上家里来，我们会有多想你。可是，我希望塞巴斯蒂安有各种类型的朋友，不只是你一个朋友。贝尔主教告诉我，他从来不和别的天主教徒联系，也从来不去纽曼俱乐部，甚至很少去做弥撒。绝不是说他只应该认识天主教徒，不过他应该认识几个。要真是孤单一个人的话，那是需要很强大的信仰的，塞巴斯蒂安的信仰可并不强大。

406
-

’After that happy luncheon together. When you left he was so sweet to me, just as he used to be as a little boy, and I agreed to all he wanted. You know I had been doubtful about his sharing rooms with you. I know you’ll understand me, when I say that. You know that we are all fond of you apart from your being Sebastian’s friend. We should miss you so much if you ever stopped coming to stay with us. But I want Sebastian to have all sorts of friends, not just one. Mgr Bell tells me he never mixes with the other Catholics, never goes to the Newman, very rarely goes to mass even. Heaven forbid that he should only know Catholics, but he must know some. It needs a very strong faith to stand entirely alone and Sebastian’s isn’t strong.

407
-

“不过，我在星期二午餐时还是非常愉快的，一点儿都没有反对他什么。我还和他到处逛了逛，看了你们挑的房子——房子很可爱。我们还订了一些家具，你们可以从伦敦运来，把房子布置得更漂亮……可是就在我见到他的那天晚上，他！——不，查尔斯，这不合逻辑。”

407
-

’But I was so happy at luncheon on Tuesday that I gave up all my objections; I went round with him and saw the rooms you had chosen. They are charming. And we decided on some furniture you could have from London to make them nicer. And then, on the very night after I had seen him! - No Charles, it is not in the Logic of the Thing.’

408
-

她说着话，我在想：“这一篇大话准是她从她的拥趸智囊团那儿挑拣过来说的。”

408
-

As she said it I thought, ’That’s a phrase she’s picked up from one of her intellectual hangers-on.’

409
-

“呃，”我说，“那您可有什么补救的法子吗？”

409
-

’Well,’ I said, ’have you a remedy?’

410
-

“这个学院还是很好的。他们说，如果他和贝尔主教住在一起就不开除他……原本这种事情我自己是不会提出来的，但这是主教本人的想法。他特地发了封信跟你说，随时都欢迎你过去。可实际上旧宫那里既没有你住的地方，我想，你也不愿意去住。”

410
-

’The college are being extraordinarily kind. They say they will not send him down provided he goes to live with Mgr Bell. It’s not a thing I could have suggested myself, but it was the Monsignor’s own idea. He specially sent a message to you to say how welcome you would always be. There’s not room for you actually in the Old Palace, but I daresay you wouldn’t want that yourself.’

411
-

“马奇梅因夫人，如果你想把他真变成个酒鬼的话，那就这么办好了。难道你就没有看出来，任何想要监视他的主意都会将他置于死地吗？”

411
-

’Lady Marchmain, if you want to make him a drunkard that’s the way to do it. Don’t you see that any idea of his being watched would be fatal?’

412
-

“哦，亲爱的，争辩可不好。基督徒就一直认为天主教的神父是间谍。”

412
-

’Oh, dear, it’s no good trying to explain. Protestants always think Catholic priests are spies.’

413
-

“我不是这个意思。”我想解释，但又解释得很烂。“他必须得自由。”

413
-

’I don’t mean that.’ I tried to explain but made a poor business of it. ’He must feel free.’

414
-

“他是自由的，总是自由的，到现在为止仍然是，可看看结果是什么样子。”我们已经到了牛津渡口，讨论也进入僵局。我送她去修道院的路上几乎没再说什么话，再后来乘公共汽车回到卡尔法克斯。

414
-

’But he’s been free, always, up till now, and look at the result.’ We had reached the ferry; we had reached a deadlock. With scarcely another word I saw her to the convent, then took the bus back to Carfax.

415
-

塞巴斯蒂安在我的房间里等我。“我要给爸爸拍海底电缆电报，”他说，“他不会让他们逼我住到那个神父家的。”

415
-

Sebastian was in my rooms waiting for me. ’I’m going to cable to papa,’ he said. ’He won’t let them force me into this priest’s house.’

416
-

“可要是他们把这个作为你上学的条件怎么办呢？”

416
-

’But if they make it a condition of your coming up?’

417
-

“那我就不上了。你怎么不替我想想呢——每周两次弥撒，伺候那些扭捏作态的天主教新生吃茶点，陪那些来短期讲课的人在纽曼俱乐部吃饭，有客人来才喝一杯葡萄酒，贝尔主教会把我盯得死死的，让我别喝太多，我前脚才离开，他后脚就跟人说我是这里让人伤透了脑筋的酒鬼，之所以我被留下来了，是因为我母亲有多迷人……是这么回事吧？”

417
-

’I shan’t come up. Can you imagine me - serving mass twice a week, helping at tea parties for shy Catholic freshmen, dining with the visiting lecturer at the Newman, drinking a glass of port when we have guests, with Mgr Bell’s eye on me to see I don’t get too much, being explained,when I was out of the room, as the rather embarrassing local inebriate who’s being taken in because his mother is so charming?’

418
-

“我跟她说过这么做行不通。”我说。

418
-

’I told her it wouldn’t do,’ I said.

419
-

“今天晚上我们真的一醉方休怎样？”

419
-

’Shall we get really drunk tonight?’

420
-

“只这一回倒不会有什么坏处。”我说。

420
-

’It’s the one time it could do no conceivable harm,’ I said.

421
-

[p1]“不惧世俗？”

421
-

’Contra mundum?’

422
-

[p2]“不惧世俗。”

422
-

’Contra mundum.’

423
-

“祝你幸福，查尔斯。留给我们的晚上不多了。”

423
-

’Bless you, Charles. There aren’t many evenings left to us.’

424
-

这天晚上，也是许多星期以来的第一次，我们一起喝了个酩酊大醉。我把他送到大门口，午夜钟声全部响起，踉跄着回到自己的房间，头顶的满天繁星在塔楼间转得人头晕目眩，衣服也没脱就睡下了，我已经有一年没这样醉过了。

424
-

And that night, the first time for many weeks, we got deliriously drunk together; I saw him to the gate as all the bells were striking midnight, and reeled back to my rooms under a starry heaven which swam dizzily among the towers, and fell asleep in my clothes as I had not done for a year.

425
-

马奇梅因夫人是第二天离开的牛津，带着塞巴斯蒂安一起。我和布莱兹赫德去了他房间，把哪些要给他寄过去哪些要留下的东西挑拣出来。

425
-

Next day Lady Marchmain left Oxford, taking Sebastian with her. Brideshead and I went to his rooms to sort out what he would have sent on and what leave behind.

426
-

布莱兹赫德还像之前一样严肃冷漠。“可惜塞巴斯蒂安和贝尔主教不熟，”他说，“他会发现和这个人一起住是很好的。我最后一年上学的时候就住在他那儿。我母亲认为塞巴斯蒂安铁定是个酒鬼了，他是吗？”

426
-

Brideshead was as grave and impersonal as ever. ’It’s a pity Sebastian doesn’t know Mgr Bell better,’ he said. ’He’d find him a charming man to live with. I was there my last year. My mother believes Sebastian is a confirmed drunkard. Is he?’

427
-

“他有变成酒鬼的危险。”

427
-

’He’s in danger of becoming one.’

428
-

“我相信上帝更喜欢酒鬼，而不是那些德高望重的人。”

428
-

’I believe God prefers drunkards to a lot of respectable people.’

429
-

“看在上帝的份上，”我说，因为那天上午我差点儿就哭出来了，“为什么动不动就要把上帝扯上？”

429
-

’For God’s sake.’ I said, for I was near to tears that morning, why bring God into everything?’

430
-

“抱歉抱歉，我忘记了。可是你看那是一个超级可笑的问题。”

430
-

’I’m sorry. I forgot. But you know that’s an extremely funny question.’

431
-

“可笑吗？”

431
-

’Is it?’

432
-

“对我觉得可笑，对你不。”

432
-

’To me. Not to you.’

433
-

“对我来说不可笑。我寻思，要是没有你们那套宗教说，塞巴斯蒂安本来有可能是一个快乐、健康的人。”

433
-

’No, not to me. It seems to me that without your religion Sebastian would have the chance to be a happy and healthy man.

434
-

“这话值得商榷，”布莱兹赫德说，“你认为他还会需要这只大象脚[10]吗？”

[10]指象脚形状的字纸篓。
434
-

’It’s arguable,’ said Brideshead. ’Do you think he will need this elephant’s foot again?’

435
-

当天傍晚，我穿过院子去找柯林斯。他一个人正坐在窗前就着越来越暗的光看书。“喂！”他说，“进来吧。一整个学期都没看见你，恐怕我这儿也没有什么好招待的。你怎么离开了你那聪明人的圈子啦？”

435
-

That evening I went across the quad to visit Collins. He was alone with his texts, working by the failing light at his open window. ’Hullo,’ he said. ’Come in. I haven’t seen you all the term. I’m afraid I’ve nothing to offer you. Why have you deserted the smart set?’

436
-

“我是全牛津最孤单的人了，”我说，“塞巴斯蒂安·弗莱特被开除了。”

436
-

’I’m the loneliest man in Oxford,’ I said. ’Sebastian Flyte’s been sent down.’

437
-

过了一会儿我问他在这么长的假期里都干什么了。他对我讲了，可是听着很无趣。后来我又问他是不是已经找好了下学期的住处，他告诉我找到了，虽然很远，不过很舒服。他是和学院论文评定委员会秘书廷盖特合住的。

437
-

Presently I asked him what he was doing in the long vacation. He told me; it sounded excruciatingly dull. Then I asked him if he had got digs for next term. Yes, he told me, rather far out but very comfortable. He was sharing with Tyngate, the secretary of the college Essay Society.

438
-

“还有间房空着。巴克要来住，可是他觉得既然正在竞选学生会主席，就该住得近些。”

438
-

’There’s one room we haven’t filled yet. Barker was coming, but he feels, now he’s standing for president of the Union, he ought to be nearer in.’

439
-

我们心里都在想，我也许会租下那一间。

439
-

It was in both our minds that perhaps I might take that room.

440
-

“你要去哪儿住？”

440
-

’Where are you going.?’

441
-

“我本来要和塞巴斯蒂安去默顿大街住的，可现在已经不行了。”

441
-

’I was going to Merton Street with Sebastian Flyte. That’s no use now.’

442
-

我们两人到底谁也没有提出租那间房子，时机错过了。我走的时候他说：“我希望你能找到另外的人去默顿大街。”我说：“我希望你找到人在伊弗莱路。”后来我再也没有跟他说起过这件事。

442
-

Still neither of us made the suggestion and the moment passed. When I left he said: ’I hope you find someone for Merton Street,’ and I said, ’I hope you find someone for the Iffley Road,’ and I never spoke to him again.

443
-

这一学期只剩下十天了。稀里糊涂混过了这几天，我回到了伦敦，与去年一样的是没有任何计划，不一样的是心境大变了。

443
-

There was only ten days of term to go; I got through them somehow and returned to London as I had done in such different circumstances the year before, with no plans made.

444
-

“你的那位漂亮朋友，”我父亲说，“没有和你一起来吗？”

444
-

’That very good-looking friend of yours,’ asked my father. ’Is he not with you?’

445
-

“没有。”

445
-

’No.’

446
-

“我还以为他把这儿当作自己的家了。他没来很遗憾，我很喜欢他。”

446
-

’I quite thought he had taken this over as his home. I’m sorry, I liked him.’

447
-

“爸爸，你是不是特别希望我取得学位？”

447
-

’Father, do you particularly want me to take my degree?’

448
-

“我希望你得学位？我希望这个做什么？对我没用。照我看它对你也没有多大用处。”

448
-

’I want you to? Good gracious, why should I want such a thing? No use to me. Not much use to you either, as far as I’ve seen.’

449
-

“我近来也真这么认为了。我觉得再回牛津上学可能反而是白白浪费时间。”

449
-

’That’s exactly what I’ve been thinking. I thought perhaps it was rather a waste of time going back to Oxford.’

450
-

直到这时，我父亲对我正在说的话才多少注意了一些。他放下书，取下眼镜，注视着我，“听着像是你被开除了，”他说，“我哥哥警告过我的。”

450
-

Until then my father had taken only a limited interest in what I was saying: now he put down his book, took off his spectacles, and looked at me hard. ’You’ve been sent down,’ he said. ’My brother warned me of this.’

451
-

“没，还没。”

451
-

’No, I’ve not.’

452
-

“那么好，你想说什么？”他烦躁地，又戴上眼镜，瞄着书上那页他正看的什么地方。“每个人都至少要待上三年。我知道有个人为了取得神学学位用了七年时间。”

452
-

’Well, then, what’s all the talk about? he asked testily, resuming his spectacles, searching for his place on the page. ’Everyone stays up at least three years. I knew one man who took seven to get a pass degree in theology.’

453
-

“我只是想，如果我以后从事的是并不需要学位的职业，那么我最好还是现在就开始干我打算干的事。我打算做画家。”

453
-

’I only thought that if I was not going to take up one of the professions where a degree is necessary, it might be best to start now on what I intend doing. I intend to be a painter.’

454
-

但是当时我父亲就此没给我答复。

454
-

But to this my father made no answer at the time.

455
-

无论如何，这一想法似乎在他心里深深扎了根，等到我们再次说到这件事时，便明白确定下来了。

455
-

The idea, however, seemed to take root in his mind; by the time we spoke of the matter again it was firmly established.

456
-

“一旦当了画家，”星期日吃午饭的时候他说，“你就得需要间画室。”

456
-

’When you’re a painter,’ he said at Sunday luncheon, ’You’ll need a studio.’

457
-

“是的。”

457
-

’Yes.’

458
-

“呃，家里可没有画室……连一间可以让你当画室的说得过去的房间也没有。我可不打算让你到什么画廊美术馆之类的去作画。”

458
-

’Well, there isn’t a studio here. There isn’t even a room you could use decently as a studio. I’m not going to have you painting in the gallery.’

459
-

“我压根儿就没有这么想过。”

459
-

’No. I never meant to.’

460
-

“我既不愿意看到家里满屋子模特儿，也不愿意听到评论家可怕的行话。再说我也不喜欢松节油的气味。我猜你是要一不做二不休，打算用油画颜料吧？”我父亲他们那代人，是要看用油画颜料还是水彩去将画家分为严肃和业余的两种的。

460
-

’Nor will I have undraped models all over the house, nor critics with their horrible jargon.And I don’t like the smell of turpentine. I presume you intend to do the thing thoroughly and use oil paint?’ My father belonged to a generation which divided painters into the serious and the amateur, according as they used oil or water.

461
-

“我认为第一年我不该画太多油画。无论如何我应该进学校学习。”

461
-

’I don’t suppose I should do much painting the first year. Anyway, I should be working at a school.’

462
-

“出国去吗？”我父亲满怀希望地问。“我相信，国外很有几所出色的画画学校。”

462
-

’Abroad?’ asked my father hopefully. ’There are some excellent schools abroad, I believe.’

463
-

事情进展得比我预想的要快多了。

463
-

It was all happening rather faster than I intended.

464
-

“出国或是在这儿都可以。我得先四处转转。”

464
-

’Abroad or here. I should have to look round first.’

465
-

“那就出国转转。”他说。

465
-

’Look round abroad,’ he said.

466
-

“这么说你同意我离开牛津了？”

466
-

’Then you agree to my leaving Oxford?’

467
-

“同意？同意什么？亲爱的儿子，你已经二十二岁了。”

467
-

’Agree? Agree? My dear boy, you’re twenty-two.’

468
-

“二十岁，”我说，“到十月份才二十一。”

468
-

’Twenty,’ I said, ’twenty-one in October.’

469
-

“是这样吗？那时间好像变长了。”

469
-

’Is that all? It seems much longer.’

470
-

马奇梅因夫人的一封来信给这一篇章画上了休止符。

470
-

A letter from Lady Marchmain completes this episode.

471
-

我亲爱的查尔斯，塞巴斯蒂安今天早晨离开了，出国到他父亲那儿。在他动身前我问是否给你写过信，他说没写，这样我就必须写了，尽管不可能盼望一封信就把我们最后一次散步时无法讲出的话都讲出来讲明白。可也不想将你置于一无所知的境地。

471
-

’My dear Charles,’ she wrote, ’Sebastian left me this morning to join his father abroad. Before he went I asked him if he had written to you. He said no, so I must write, tho’ I can hardly hope to say in a letter what I could not say on our last walk. But you must not be left in silence.

472
-

学院只是让塞巴斯蒂安停学一个学期，圣诞节过后就可以复学，条件是他得和贝尔主教住在一起。这桩事情需要他自己定夺。同时，萨姆格拉斯先生非常好心肠地同意照管他。等他看望他父亲回来，萨姆格拉斯先生会带他去拉凡纳，萨姆格拉斯先生早就想去那里调查一些东正教教堂了。他殷切希望此行或许会唤起塞巴斯蒂安对宗教的新的兴趣。

472
-

’The college has sent Sebastian down for a term only, and will take him back after Christmas on condition he goes to live with Mgr Bell. It is for him to decide. Meanwhile Mr Samgrass has very kindly consented to take charge of him. As soon as his visit to his father is over Mr Samgrass will pick him up and the will go together to the Levant, where Mr Samgrass has long been anxious to investigate a number of orthodox monasteries. He hopes this may be a new interest for Sebastian.

473
-

塞巴斯蒂安在这里始终过得不愉快。

473
-

’Sebastian’s stay here has not been happy.

474
-

他们圣诞节再回来时，我想塞巴斯蒂安会很希望见到你，我们大家也是。我希望你下学期的安排按部就班，不被过分搅扰，谨祝万事胜意。

474
-

’When they come home at Christmas I know Sebastian will want to see you, and so shall we all. I hope your arrangements for next term have not been too much upset and that everything will go well with you.

475
-

你的忠诚的特里萨·马奇梅因

475
-

Yours sincerely,Teresa Marchmain.

476
-

今天早晨我去花园小房子了，万分惆怅。

476
-

’I went to the garden-room this morning and was so very sorry.’

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