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月亮和六便士|Moon and Sixpence

第四十三章|Chapter XLIII

属类： 双语小说 【分类】世界名著 -[作者: 毛姆] 阅读：[29087]
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回过头看，我认识到我写下的有关查尔斯·斯特里克兰的所有文字，看上去一定不会令人十分满意。我已经把自己知道的一些事件记录了下来，但是它们还是模糊不清的，因为我不知道导致这些事件的原因。

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Looking back, I realize that what I have written about Charles Strickland must seem very unsatisfactory. I have given incidents that came to my knowledge, but they remain obscure because I do not know the reason that led to them.

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其中最不可思议的就是斯特里克兰决心要成为一名画家，似乎很随意，虽然在他的生活环境和成长历程中一定会有原因的，但我却一无所知。从他的谈话中，我又没能收集到任何信息。

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The strangest, Strickland’s determination to become a painter, seems to be arbitrary；and though it must have had causes in the circumstances of his life, I am ignorant of them.From his own conversation I was able to glean nothing.

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如果我正在写一本长篇小说，与其去记叙我所知道的关于这人令人好奇的个性，还不如去虚构一些描述他心灵变化的材料。

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If I were writing a novel, rather than narrating such facts as I know of a curious personality, I should have invented much to account for this change of heart.

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我认为可以描写他在很小的时候，就对这行有着强烈兴趣，但是被他父亲的愿望所扼杀，或者因为要养家糊口而牺牲；我应该描写他对生活中的种种约束不耐烦，在他对艺术的激情和他身份地位所要肩负起的责任之间冲突不断，这样还能唤起读者对他的同情。

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I think I should have shown a strong vocation in boyhood, crushed by the will of his father or sacrificed to the necessity of earning a living；I should have pictured him impatient of the restraints of life；and in the struggle between his passion for art and the duties of his station I could have aroused sympathy for him.

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这样我就能把他塑造成一个个性更加鲜明的人物。兴许读者有可能在他身上看到一个新的普罗米修斯的影子，这样可能就会有机会创作出这个英雄的现代版，为了给人类谋幸福而甘愿承受各种天谴的痛苦，这一直是能打动人心的主题。

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I should so have made him a more imposing figure.Perhaps it would have been possible to see in him a new Prometheus.There was here, maybe, the opportunity for a modern version of the hero who for the good of mankind exposes himself to the agonies of the damned.It is always a moving subject.

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在另一方面，我也可以从婚姻关系的影响中找到他绘画的动机，可能有多种方式来处理这个故事。由于他的妻子爱结交一些作家、画家，与这些艺术家熟络起来以后，使得他潜在的绘画天分能够得以展示，或者可能是家庭不和谐，使得他把精力转移到自己身上。还有就是因为爱上了另外一个女人，激情把闷烧在心底的暗火扇成了明亮的火焰。

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On the other hand, I might have found his motives in the infuence of the marriage relation. There are a dozen ways in which this might be managed.A latent gift might reveal itself on acquaintance with the painters and writers whose society his wife sought；or domestic incompatibility might turn him upon himself；a love affair might fan into bright fame a fre which I could have shown smouldering dimly in his heart.

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而且，我认为也可以把斯特里克兰太太刻画成完全不同的模样，我可以罔顾事实把她描写成一个唠唠叨叨、乏味的女人，或者把她塑造成个性偏执，对精神生活毫无追求的女人。

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I think then I should have drawn Mrs.Strickland quite differently.I should have abandoned the facts and made her a nagging, tiresome woman, or else a bigoted one with no sympathy for the claims of the spirit.

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我甚至可以把斯特里克兰的婚姻写成是一种长期的折磨，只有逃离才是唯一可能的解决办法。我想可以强调斯特里克兰对他那不般配的妻子的耐心和同情，使得他不愿意摆脱身上的枷锁。我当然还可以根本不提那两个孩子的事。

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I should have made Strickland’s marriage a long torment from which escape was the only possible issue.I think I should have emphasized his patience with the unsuitable mate, and the compassion which made him unwilling to throw off the yoke that oppressed him.I should certainly have eliminated the children.

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如果想把故事写得引人入胜，我也可能会写到某种机缘下，他结识了一个老画家，此人在年轻时，或由于家境贫困，或由于渴望商业上的成功，而错误地虚掷了才华，而他看到斯特里克兰身上具有的他年轻时浪费的潜力和可能性，于是影响斯特里克兰放弃一切，追随艺术这个神圣的君主。

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An effective story might also have been made by bringing him into contact with some old painter whom the pressure of want or the desire for commercial success had made false to the genius of his youth, and who, seeing in Strickland the possibilities which himself had wasted, infuenced him to forsake all and follow the divine tyranny of art.

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我会浓笔重墨地描写这位成功的老画家。他富有而受人尊敬，然而他知道，如果他能过上另一种生活，可能会更好，但他已经没有力量去追求了。如果这样一种写法，讽刺的意味会更强。

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I think there would have been something ironic in the picture of the successful old man, rich and honoured, living in another the life which he, though knowing it was the better part, had not had the strength to pursue.

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事实却格外枯燥无味，斯特里克兰，一个刚离校门的年轻人，轻松自然地进了一家证券经纪交易所，没感到有何不妥。直到结婚，他都过着像同行们一样的普通生活，在交易所里做上几笔不大不小的交易，对德比赛马和牛津、剑桥两校的划艇比赛也很有兴趣，充其量对比赛结果下上一两镑的赌注。

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The facts are much duller. Strickland, a boy fresh from school, went into a broker’s office without any feeling of distaste.Until he married he led the ordinary life of his fellows, gambling mildly on the Exchange, interested to the extent of a sovereign or two on the result of the Derby or the Oxford and Cambridge Race.

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我认为他在业余时间还会去打打拳击，在他家壁炉上放着郎格瑞夫人和玛丽·安德森的照片，有空也翻翻《笨拙》和《体育时代》，去汉普斯特德跳跳舞。

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I think he boxed a little in his spare time.On his chimney-piece he had photographs of Mrs.Langtry and Mary Anderson.He read Punch and the Sporting Times.He went to dances in Hampstead.

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有很长一段时间我没见过他了，不过没什么关系。这些年里，他一直在为熟练掌握一门困难的艺术而苦苦挣扎，日子过得单调乏味，为了挣钱养家，也不断采取一些权宜之计，我不知道能有什么东西好写。

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It matters less that for so long I should have lost sight of him. The years during which he was struggling to acquire profciency in a diffcult art were monotonous, and I do not know that there was anything signifcant in the shifts to which he was put to earn enough money to keep him.

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记述他，实际上就是记述他看见的，发生在别人身上的事，我不认为这些事对他的性格会有任何影响。如果要写一部以现代巴黎为背景的冒险小说，他倒可能积累了丰富的素材。但是，他还是保留着超然物外的态度，从他的谈话中我们判断，这些年没有发生让他印象特别深刻的事情。

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An account of them would be an account of the things he had seen happen to other people.I do not think they had any effect on his own character.He must have acquired experiences which would form abundant material for a picaresque novel of modern Paris, but he remained aloof, and judging from his conversation there was nothing in those years that had made a particular impression on him.

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也许当他去巴黎时，年纪已经不小了，不会成为花天酒地环境的受害者。看上去似乎奇怪，他留给我的印象是这个人不善实际，有一说一。我猜想他的生活在这段时间很浪漫，但他自己当然看不出来有什么浪漫的。

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Perhaps when he went to Paris he was too old to fall a victim to the glamour of his environment.Strange as it may seem, he always appeared to me not only practical, but immensely matter-of-fact.I suppose his life during this period was romantic, but he certainly saw no romance in it.

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可能为了实现生活中的浪漫，在你身上必须要有像演员那样的东西。而且，要能够跳出自身之外，你必须观察自己的行为，而且要抱着独立和专注的兴趣去观察。但是没人比斯特里克兰更一根筋的了，我不知道谁比他有更强的自我意识。

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It may be that in order to realize the romance of life you must have something of the actor in you；and, capable of standing outside yourself, you must be able to watch your actions with an interest at once detached and absorbed.But no one was more single-minded than Strickland.I never knew anyone who was less self-conscious.

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不幸的是，我无法描述他在攀登艺术高峰的途中，如何历经艰难险阻，才成功登顶的。因为如果我能够写出他在失败面前无所畏惧，用不懈的努力和勇气扼住绝望的喉咙，面对自我怀疑——这一艺术家最大的敌人时，能够顽强地坚持不放弃。这样去写，我会激起人们对这样一个缺乏迷人之处的人物的同情，我完全清楚这一点，可我手中没有材料去这样描述。

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But it is unfortunate that I can give no description of the arduous steps by which he reached such mastery over his art as he ever acquired；for if I could show him undaunted by failure, by an unceasing effort of courage holding despair at bay, doggedly persistent in the face of self-doubt, which is the artist’s bitterest enemy, I might excite some sympathy for a personality which, I am all too conscious, must appear singularly devoid of charm.But I have nothing to go on.

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我从没见过斯特里克兰是如何工作的，我知道别的人也没见过。他的斗争与挣扎是他个人的秘密，如果在他的画室里，在孤寂中他曾绝望地和上帝的天使扭打在一起的话，他是不允许别人探测到他的痛苦的。

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I never once saw Strickland at work, nor do I know that anyone else did.He kept the secret of his struggles to himself.If in the loneliness of his studio he wrestled desperately with the Angel of the Lord he never allowed a soul to divine his anguish.

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当我写到他和布兰奇·斯特罗伊夫的关系时，我对一些只能根据事实整理出来的片段感到懊恼。为了让我的故事连贯，我本该描述一下他们悲剧性结合的进程，但是我对他们一起生活的三个月一无所知。

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When I come to his connexion with Blanche Stroeve I am exasperated by the fragmentariness of the facts at my disposal. To give my story coherence I should describe the progress of their tragic union, but I know nothing of the three months during which they lived together.I do not know how they got on or what they talked about.

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毕竟，一天有二十四个小时，感情的高峰只有在稀少的间隔才能达到，而他们怎么度过剩下的时间，我只能靠想象了。当光线尚在室内，只要布兰奇的气力还能挺得住，我想斯特里克兰就会一直画下去；当她看见他全身心都沉浸在工作中，也一定会惹得她生气。

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After all, there are twenty-four hours in the day, and the summits of emotion can only be reached at rare intervals.I can only imagine how they passed the rest of the time.While the light lasted and so long as Blanche’s strength endured, I suppose that Strickland painted, and it must have irritated her when she saw him absorbed in his work.

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那个时候，对他而言，作为情妇，她已不再存在，她只是一个模特。随后，有很长时间他们生活在一起，而没有多少话，这种状况一定吓坏了她。

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As a mistress she did not then exist for him, but only as a model；and then there were long hours in which they lived side by side in silence.It must have frightened her.

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当斯特里克兰暗示，她之所以委身于他是因为她要报复迪尔柯·斯特罗伊夫，想找到一种胜利的感觉，因为他是在她走投无路的情况下向她伸出了援手。他的这种暗示为很多阴暗的揣度打开了大门，我希望这种暗示不是真的，对我来说，它似乎过于可怕。

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When Strickland suggested that in her surrender to him there was a sense of triumph over Dirk Stroeve, because he had come to her help in her extremity, he opened the door to many a dark conjecture.I hope it was not true.It seems to me rather horrible.

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但是谁能测量出人心的微妙呢？那些只希望从人心里寻到高尚的情操和正常感情的人当然是猜不透的。

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But who can fathom the subtleties of the human heart？Certainly not those who expect from it only decorous sentiments and normal emotions.

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当布兰奇看到，斯特里克兰除了偶尔会迸发出片刻激情，大多数时间对她都是冷淡的，心中一定充满了痛苦。甚至在我提到的激情时刻，她也认识到，对于他来说，她不是个有血有肉的人，而是一个他取乐的工具；他还是一个陌生人，她试图用一切可怜的手段想把他和自己维系在一起，努力用舒适的生活网罗住他，但她殊不知他根本不在乎安逸的生活。

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When Blanche saw that, notwithstanding his moments of passion, Strickland remained aloof, she must have been filled with dismay, and even in those moments I surmise that she realized that to him she was not an individual, but an instrument of pleasure；he was a stranger still, and she tried to bind him to herself with pathetic arts.She strove to ensnare him with comfort and would not see that comfort meant nothing to him.

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她不辞辛苦地给他做他爱吃的东西，却不知道他对食物的好坏根本无所谓。她害怕让他一个人待着，总是无微不至地呵护他。当他的激情休眠的时候，她寻求去激起它，因为那时至少她还产生一种把他控制在手的幻觉。

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She was at pains to get him the things to eat that he liked, and would not see that he was indifferent to food.She was afraid to leave him alone.She pursued him with attentions, and when his passion was dormant sought to excite it， for then at least she had the illusion of holding him.

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也许她动动脑筋也会想到，她锻造的锁链只会唤起他摧毁束缚的本能，就像厚玻璃窗户会使你的手指头发痒，想找半块砖头把它砸破；但是她的内心缺乏足够的理性，使得她继续一段她明知是致命的旅程。

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Perhaps she knew with her intelligence that the chains she forged only aroused his instinct of destruction, as the plate-glass window makes your fingers itch for half a brick；but her heart, incapable of reason, made her continue on a course she knew was fatal.

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她一定很不幸福，但是爱情的盲目使她相信自己渴望的东西是真实的，她的爱情是那么伟大，对她来说，似乎不可能不会唤醒同样的爱来回报她。

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She must have been very unhappy.But the blindness of love led her to believe what she wanted to be true, and her love was so great that it seemed impossible to her that it should not in return awake an equal love.

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然而，我对斯特里克兰性格的研究，还有一个缺憾，它比对很多事实不了解还要严重得多。因为他和女人们的关系是如此惹人注目和突出，所以我写了很多，而实际上它们只是他生活中并不太重要的部分。而具有讽刺意味的是，它们却悲剧性地影响了其他人的生活。他真实的生活由梦想和巨量艰辛工作组成。

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But my study of Strickland’s character suffers from a graver defect than my ignorance of many facts. Because they were obvious and striking, I have written of his relations to women；and yet they were but an insignificant part of his life.It is an irony that they should so tragically have affected others.His real life consisted of dreams and of tremendously hard work.

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小说的虚构也正是在此处。因为在男人身上，一般说来，爱情只不过是每天各种事务中所发生的一段小插曲而已，小说中却要强调它，把它放在重要位置上，对于实际生活，这是不真实的。

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Here lies the unreality of fction. For in men, as a rule, love is but an episode which takes its place among the other affairs of the day, and the emphasis laid on it in novels gives it an importance which is untrue to life.

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男人们几乎都不会把它看作是世界上最重要的事，不过这些男人也不是很有生活情趣的人；甚至于那些把爱情看得很重的女人，对这些男人也看不起。女人们会被男人们奉承，被撩拨得春心萌动，但她们有一种不安的感觉，觉得自己是可怜的人。

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There are few men to whom it is the most important thing in the world, and they are not very interesting ones；even women, with whom the subject is of paramount interest, have a contempt for them.They are fattered and excited by them, but have an uneasy feeling that they are poor creatures.

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甚至在恋爱期间短暂的间隔，男人们也会做其他一些能分散他注意力的事情，比如对从事谋生的买卖投入精力，专注于体育活动，对艺术兴趣盎然。

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But even during the brief intervals in which they are in love, men do other things which distract their minds；the trades by which they earn their living engage their attention；they are absorbed in sport；they can interest themselves in art.

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在大多数情况下，他们把自己的不同活动分别安排在不同的领域里，他们从事一项活动，就会暂时把另一项活动排除在外。他们有一种能力，在某个时间段，他们会全神贯注地干一件已经占据了身心的工作，如果做一件工作的时间和精力被另一件工作所侵占，他们就会非常恼火。

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For the most part, they keep their various activities in various compartments, and they can pursue one to the temporary exclusion of the other.They have a faculty of concentration on that which occupies them at the moment, and it irks them if one encroaches on the other.

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作为情人，男人和女人的区别就是，女人可以全天候地沉湎于爱情，而男人只是有时有晌地顾及一下它。

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As lovers, the difference between men and women is that women can love all day long, but men only at times.

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斯特里克兰的性欲只占他生活中的一小部分，它无关紧要，有时还很烦人，他的灵魂目标在是其他地方。他也有狂野的激情，偶尔欲望也会充满他的身体，迫使他放浪形骸，纵欲狂欢一回。但他憎恨这种本能夺走了他自我控制的能力，我都想到了，他甚至还憎恨在他淫荡时必不可少的伴侣。

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With Strickland the sexual appetite took a very small place. It was unimportant.It was irksome.His soul aimed elsewhither.He had violent passions, and on occasion desire seized his body so that he was driven to an orgy of lust, but he hated the instincts that robbed him of his self-possession.I think, even, he hated the inevitable partner in his debauchery.

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当他重新控制自己后，看到他刚享用完的女人，会不寒而栗。然后，他的思想会在天堂中安静地飘荡，他对那个女人感到恐怖，也许就像画上的蝴蝶，在花丛上翩翩起舞，可分明感觉到它是一只肮脏的蛹，蝴蝶只是胜利地从它的蛹里飞出。

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When he had regained command over himself, he shuddered at the sight of the woman he had enjoyed.His thoughts floated then serenely in the empyrean, and he felt towards her the horror that perhaps the painted butterfly, hovering about the flowers, feels for the filthy chrysalis from which it has triumphantly emerged.

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我认为艺术是性本能的表现形式。当在那不勒斯海湾金黄的月光下看到一位可爱的女人，同样的感情会在男人们的心中被激起，还有提香的《墓穴》就是在这种本能的驱动下创作出来的。

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I suppose that art is a manifestation of the sexual instinct.It is the same emotion which is excited in the human heart by the sight of a lovely woman, the Bay of Naples under the yellow moon, and the Entombment of Titian.

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有可能斯特里克兰憎恨这种性欲的释放，因为这种感觉和他从艺术创作中获得的满足感相比，在他看来似乎是粗野的。因为我描述的这个男人是残忍、自私、野蛮和放荡的，而他同时还是一个伟大的艺术家，对我来说，好像也觉得很不可思议，但事实就是如此。

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It is possible that Strickland hated the normal release of sex because it seemed to him brutal by comparison with the satisfaction of artistic creation.It seems strange even to myself, when I have described a man who was cruel, selfish, brutal and sensual, to say that he was a great idealist.The fact remains.

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他生活得很拮据，甚至比一个工匠还穷。他工作得很辛苦，对大多数人追求的雅致和美好的生活一点儿也不放在心上。他对名和利都不在乎。

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He lived more poorly than an artisan. He worked harder.He cared nothing for those things which with most people make life gracious and beautiful.He was indifferent to money.He cared nothing about fame.

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你都无法赞扬他抵制了诱惑，大多数人为了和这个世界妥协，必须接受这些诱惑的支配，而他压根就没有感觉到诱惑，妥协的念头也就绝不可能闪过脑海。

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You cannot praise him because he resisted the temptation to make any of those compromises with the world which most of us yield to.He had no such temptation.It never entered his head that compromise was possible.

40
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他生活在巴黎，却比生活在底比斯沙漠中的隐士还要孤独。他对同伴们一无所求，除了告诉他们让他一个人待着。他一心都扑在他的目标上，为了追求这个目标，他愿意牺牲的不仅仅是他自己——这一点很多人倒是都能做到——而且还有别人。他生活在自己的幻境中。

40
-

He lived in Paris more lonely than an anchorite in the deserts of Thebes.He asked nothing from his fellows except that they should leave him alone.He was single-hearted in his aim, and to pursue it he was willing to sacrifice not only himself-many can do that-but others.He had a vision.

41
-

斯特里克兰是一个令人嫌恶的人，但是我仍然认为他是一个伟大的人。

41
-

Strickland was an odious man, but I still think he was a great one.

序号 英文/音标 中文解释 更多操作

unsatisfactory

[ˌʌnˌsætɪs’fæktəri]

adj.不能令人满意的

conversation

[ˌkɒnvə’seɪʃn]

n.谈话;会话

narrate

[nə’reɪt]

v.叙述;给(电视或电影)作旁白

impatient

[ɪm’peɪʃnt]

adj.不耐烦的;急躁的

arouse

[ə’raʊz]

v.叫醒;唤醒;激起;睡醒

mankind

[mæn’kaɪnd]

n.人类;男人

agony

[’æɡəni]

n.极度的痛苦;挣扎

dim

[dɪm]

adj.暗淡的;模糊的;笨的

nag

[næɡ]

vt.不断唠叨;指责;困扰，使…烦恼

unwilling

[ʌn’wɪlɪŋ]

adj.不愿意的

tyranny

[’tɪrəni]

n.暴政;苛政;专制

ironic

[aɪ’rɒnɪk]

adj.说反话的;讽刺的

Oxford

[’ɒksfəd]

n.牛津城;牛津大学;牛津

monotonous

[mə’nɒtənəs]

adj.单调的

detach

[dɪ’tætʃ]

vt.使分离;拆卸;派遣【计算机】 脱离.

mastery

[’mɑːstəri]

n.精通;掌握;熟练;控制

despair

[dɪ’speə(r)]

n.绝望;失望

persistent

[pə’sɪstənt]

adj.坚持的;连续的;固执的

excite

[ɪk’saɪt]

vt.使兴奋;使激动;刺激;激起

singular

[’sɪŋɡjələ(r)]

a. 非凡的；卓越的;

coherence

[kəʊ’hɪərəns]

n.一致;连贯

irritate

[’ɪrɪteɪt]

v.激怒;使疼痛或发炎

mistress

[’mɪstrəs]

n.主妇;女主人;情妇

conjecture

[kən’dʒektʃə(r)]

n.推测;臆测

decorous

[’dekərəs]

adj.合宜的;高雅的;端庄的

dismay

[dɪs’meɪ]

n.沮丧;绝望

dormant

[’dɔːmənt]

adj.休眠的;睡眠的;静止的;潜伏的;匿名的;(动物等)冬眠的

forge

[fɔːdʒ]

vt.锻造;伪造;建立

itch

[ɪtʃ]

n.痒;渴望;疥癣

incapable

[ɪn’keɪpəbl]

adj.无能力的;不胜任的

blindness

[’blaɪndnəs]

n.盲目;失明;愚昧

tremendous

[trə’mendəs]

adj.巨大的;惊人的

untrue

[ʌn’truː]

adj.不真实的;不正确的;不忠实的;不符合(标准、原则等)的

contempt

[kən’tempt]

n.轻视;轻蔑

uneasy

[ʌn’iːzi]

adj.不自在的 ；心神不安的 ；不稳定的;不舒服的

compartment

[kəm’pɑːtmənt]

n.间隔;个别室;卧车包房

encroach

[ɪn’krəʊtʃ]

v.侵占;侵犯;侵害

debauchery

[dɪ’bɔːtʃəri]

n.放荡;沉湎酒色

shudder

[’ʃʌdə(r)]

vi.战栗;发抖

Serene

[sə’riːn]

adj.安详的;宁静的;平静的Serene.adj.尊贵的

hover

[’hɒvə(r)]

v.盘旋;徘徊;靠近(某事物)，维持在某种不确定的状态

triumphant

[traɪ’ʌmfənt]

adj.胜利的;得意洋洋的

manifestation

[ˌmænɪfe’steɪʃn]

n.表现;示威运动;显灵

idealist

[aɪ’diːəlɪst]

n.唯心主义者;理想主义者

gracious

[’ɡreɪʃəs]

adj.亲切的;高尚的;仁慈的;和蔼的;优雅的

single-hearted

[’sɪŋgl’hɑːtɪd]

诚实的

odious

[’əʊdiəs]

adj.可憎的;讨厌的;令人作呕的

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